Brooklyn Lindsey

Happily Ever After Wednesday

2012-01-26T09:35:00.001-05:00

Chirpy this morning. Thus, the randomness. Enjoy.

The fruit of your heart. Why what you do in ministry matters.

2012-01-24T15:41:00.005-05:00

Youth leaders have special places where they keep encouragement that comes from teenagers and parents. It used to be a shoebox collection but in recent years has turned into an inbox collection. So, now I have an inbox to keep the special emails. They become the evidence that what we are striving for is working and that the Kingdom of God is a little more at hand because of what Christ is doing in us and through us.

I got an email today that reminded me of this and wanted to share it with you, my friends in ministry. Don't give up. What you do matters. It's working. You are making an indelible difference the in the lives of the teenagers and families you reach.

And sometimes...many times...the teenagers we reach in turn reach their own families. I'm living proof of that.

A note from Anne-Marie (a mom of two middle school students):

Words can’t express the feeling I have when she talks about it and the idea of her going through with it puts me in tears. She is so IN LOVE with God and I owe SO much of it to you and your program. I think it’s amazing the way your team is able to connect with the kids and make it ‘cool’ to be a Christian! My daughter is my inspiration. I want to love as freely and innocently as she does. I want to look for the good and help people the way her heart guides her to. She’s absolutely amazing!

Wow. Thank you Anne-Marie for the reminder and I know God is going to give you the love you are looking for.

A moment to seek Him: Forever

2012-01-17T09:15:00.003-05:00

I need nothing more in life to be emptied so that I can become filled with the indwelling of God's Spirit. This song is a prayer. Sing it with me as if we were all meeting for prayer this morning. Raise your hands wherever you are. Let the struggles and momentary troubles fade. Breathe. Let us not forget, that today, as you seek Him, your life honors Him, the Savior.

Happy Trails To You- Serving Together This Year

2012-01-04T09:04:00.004-05:00

It’s time for some of us to pack up. And by pack, I don’t mean move. I mean gather together and go for the ride of our lives.

I’m a nostalgic person. If you’re not, please forgive quickly and hang with me. I envision youth ministry in the next decade as a trail ride. Where all of us do what my husband and I did on our trip to Colorado. We work and persist together. We live cheering each other on. We find ourselves enjoying the thrills of breakneck pace. We slow, being present in the moments when we don’t have words to describe what we’re feeling. We devote, sharing times of leisure, rest, and restoration. Our arms open, giving each other a break. We ride, taking the lead to let others draft. We uplift, falling back to let others lead. We play, singing songs that make us happy, singing songs that share the story of a God who went on a great adventure to give us life in His Son.

If you can’t imagine what this looks like, maybe it’ll look a lot like an old Roy Rogers movie?

I want this for our ministries and for our lives. We want to be front porch people in all ares of our lives, including those places where we share ministry with others. We want to be accessible, inclusive, helpers on the way. It’s a great adventure to ride together through the good spots and the bad, rounding up and pointing up.

Read the rest on The Youth Cartel Blog.

Credibility

2011-12-27T10:36:00.002-05:00

From a recent slant...

Looking back, I wish someone had been there to tell me how to own my ministry without disowning the church.

For too long I jumped around, waiting for the perfect scenario to do ministry when, all along, the perfect scenario could be found as I remained in imperfect community, with humility, seeking to serve and share the gifts I’ve received with others.

When I came to my current assignment, the word God gave me was remain. Remaining somewhere gives a person a track record that can be telling.

“I can trust you.”
“I’ve seen you weather storms.”
“I know you won’t lose track of my kids… Okay, you’ll probably lose track of my kids! But I know you’ve trained and equipped enough leaders that someone will notice quickly and you’ll have a plan.”
“I know when you tell me something, it’s the truth.”
“I know if I’m being corrected it’s because you love me, just like you’ve loved so many before me.”

More...

Our Sticky Dinner Table

2011-12-17T16:16:00.004-05:00

Kirra, our older and wiser four year old, told us with confidence (as she was moving food around on her plate), “God helps us do hard things.”

Read how intergenerational ministry is changing my family and journey with us in making sticky faith a priority....

Read the rest on The Sticky Faith Blog.

Lose the Lorem Ipsum: Educate yourself on teens and texting.

2011-12-13T16:46:00.004-05:00

Listen folks.

Texting isn't going anywhere.
My four year old knows how to
navigate smart devices
better than I do.
But it doesn't mean we can't and shouldn't have boundaries.

I was re-reading some research today and would like every parent to know more about the topic of teens and texting, relevant especially during those holiday breaks when students have more time on their hands (pun intended).

Read this great article from The Blog of Children's Hospital Los Angeles and find out how texting can effect your children, and how to set some healthy boundaries.

Parents, you are the most influential role models and supporters of your children--you have this--you can do it--and we'll be cheering you on the entire way.

There's a ball in a boot in the bathroom! | Winter Games For Youth Groups

2011-12-08T09:51:00.006-05:00

About 20 minutes before youth group was to start, I saw some unusual activity going on around the side-by-side entryways to our bathrooms in the foyer. There were a suspicious amount of guys together in there. When I see more than two or three my immediate response is to get an adult leader for a quick bathroom check. As I bolted to get Jared (a.k.a. youth leader wrestler ninja) dispatched to bathroom recon I noticed similar activity going on in the girls bathroom . Girls running in and out, all sorts of shrieking going on within.

I did what any great youth worker would do.
I waited for Jared to come out before I did anything.
He'd be the litmus test for how I would soon enter the girls bathroom.
When he came out laughing I knew that something was up but
nothing dangerous or humiliating was happening.

Whew. I still have a job.

Then he told me the tale.

"The boy's said, THERE'S A BALL, IN A BOOT, IN THE GIRLS BATHROOM."

What?

"Yes, they said THERE'S A BALL, IN A BOOT, IN THE GIRLS BATHROOM AND WE NEED IT BACK."

I entered the girls restroom past the sinks, past the toilets, and into the shower area where there were lockers and a handful of girls hiding behind shower curtains.

I asked them the only question I knew to ask....

"IS THERE A BALL? IN A BOOT? HERE IN THE BATHROOM??"

That's when the smallest of the girls, Brianna, comes up to me wide eyed and shoeless. "Yes" but they were throwing it at us and I didn't know where to put it so I took off my boots and hid it in there and put it in a locker!"

I couldn't help but laugh. That's awesome! Show me.

She walked me over to a locker and under a pile of jackets were the boots and inside one of them was a small ball. And all of this, as the boys had stated was happening in the bathroom.

I walked the girls out with the ball and asked Adrian to apologize for throwing the ball at the girls, even if he didn't do it on purpose and I asked Bri to give the ball back. Even though their game had ended I could see the satisfaction on the girls faces as if they had won.

So far, our game night was off to a great start!

I used a free ebook that I got awhile back to plan some winter games and I'll share with you how they worked out. You may want to try these during your Christmas gatherings. The whole night was a blast and I left feeling like I knew my students better. I hope you have a merry Christmas and I hope play is a part of your philosophy for ministry. The release from the daily stress they (and we) face is priceless and we find ourselves loving each other through stolen bouncy balls, boot stash, and bathroom shenanigans.

Merry Christmas!

Bob Sled Relays (refer to ebook)

Game notes: This is a great game where partners on teams of 10-12 relay race on a wood floor using freezer paper as bobsleds. the ebook says to use the slick side of the wax paper. FAIL!! Wax paper is waxy on BOTH sides. Do not use this or the teens won't budge and inch. We realized this about an hour before and Jared (same Jared mentioned above) saved the day by getting FREEZER Paper. It's strong so it won't tear, wider, and slides great.

Indoor Snow Ball Fight: (see eBook)

Game Notes: Awesome game for people who never get to see snow. Or, for people who hate being in the cold but would love a good snowball fight. It's the same concept as dodgeball except you are using jumbo marshmallows.
We used the giant campfire marshmallows you can buy at Wal-Mart. They were AMAZING. The game instructions say not to let students aim for the head--even though it won't hurt. IT ABSOLUTELY HURTS! If you're using a gym a flying giant marshmallow can feel like a can of pilsbury dough exploding on your forehead. Be careful. I may have a mild concussion and my eye may be glued shut just a little. Just kidding--no injuries at all but be careful with the head shots.

(By the way, the same girls who had the ball in the boot in the bathroom, strategically hoarded masses of marshmallows in the corner of the room as they were pretending to "not play". Then they launched a full assault on the other team at the end. Genius.)

Elf Yourself:

This one is for next week but I'll throw it in here because I've done it before. We use a jib jab greeting to "elf" some of our leaders and show it to everyone. Then we have stockings, shoes, belts, sweaters, etc. lined up for volunteers to elf themselves in a race. Goodwill is a great place to find elf garb and it's a cool photo/ instagram opportunity too. You can integrate instagram with your youth group twitter account or Facebook page to keep people talking about the fun they had with their friends. I like to put one or two high school leaders in charge of great camera shots to keep me free to comment on the games and participate as well.

Bake You Very Much.

2011-11-28T20:09:00.005-05:00

Let's face it. We'd be donezo if we didn't have volunteers helping us in ministry.

I can't thank our leaders enough. There is no paycheck at the end of the week for the time that they share with us or the teenagers we serve.

If I had unlimited resources I'd send them all on a vacation, on a mission trip that they chose, and give them the anti-pizza gift card--to a steakhouse of their choice. They would never ask for this and most would refuse this (the veterans would gladly accept), but I'd like to give it anyway.

What we do offer them are the fruits of ministry. They get to see the seeds of faith planted, watered, and tended and then watch to see them bloom in a kaleidoscope of ways.

We offer them great stories to tell at work. Who else can say, "I catapulted a 70 pound middle schooler into the lake on my vacation!" or "There was no sleep for me this weekend, but my status as the state go-cart champion remains." or "I helped a teenager find Jesus during my lunch hour."

Volunteer leaders are hands down my most valuable gift in ministry.

So how do we thank them?

Telling them is a good start.
Gifts are nice too.
But if you're budget is small or non-existent, I suggest baking to start thanking.

I realize that there are a lot of male youth leaders and pastors out there would have never baked anything in their lives. (Perhaps some of the ladies too). I challenge you to start now. It's not hard. And if I can do it (the one with scars on my arms from trying to cook dinner for my husband), than anyone can.

Here are a few recipes that I'll be baking up with my friend Erika (also a volunteer youth leader) to thank our leaders for all they do. If you are one of my leaders and you're reading this, then let thy mouth water. These puppies are going to be good!

Cookie Dough Candy Cookies (From the Pioneer Woman. Everything this lady does is mint. Sooooo goood.)

Salted Caramel Thumbprint Cookies

Chocolate Sandwich Cookies (Homeade Oreos)

Chocolate Peppermint Crinkle Cookies

(P.S. Update on my recent sugar fast. I'm still staying away from the stuff. I give in for the big things like Thanksgiving or celebrating something like a birthday. But just because I'm taking a break from the white goodness doesn't mean everyone else has to!)

PINK OUT 2012

2011-11-28T16:07:00.002-05:00

Go local. | Youth ministry in community.

2011-11-28T15:21:00.007-05:00

I've been hearing about an annual event in our area called "The Holiday Walkabout". From what I've read, it'd be a great opportunity to kill two birds with one stone.

Birdie numero uno: Hanging out with my precious family doing something festive and fun together.
Birdie numero dos: Mingling with our community, families, and my guess...tons of middle schoolers.

What will you do locally to love and "walkabout with" your community?

I pray that we wouldn't be so stressed out about our roles and responsibilities that we miss the opportunities to love each other, share peace and the warmth of Christ. Let's let Jesus break into our lives like he did over 2,000 years ago--in a humble and quiet way, surrounded by the community who was looking for hope.

Hebrews 10:25 NLT

And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.

Some opportunities in the 33813:

Annual Holiday Walkabout
Tuesday, November 29th - Downtown Lakeland
This annual event in Downtown Lakeland celebrates the holidays with shopping, dining, music, horse-drawn wagon rides and more! Holiday music from many area schools and churches create a festive atmosphere. And don’t forget shopping! If you want a gift that doesn’t say I was mass produced in a department store, then shopping in Downtown Lakeland is for you. Stores and restaurants will be open from 6:00 pm until 9:00 pm.

Free parking will be available at the main street garage. The public parking entrance is located on Cedar St. The Bay Street entrance is also open and can be accessed from Tennessee Ave.

Lights of Lakeland
Highland Park Church of the Nazarene
4730 Lakeland Highlands Road, Lakeland FL 33813
December 2,3,4 and
December 9.10,11
6:30 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. nightly

Free event. Free parking.
Bring your camera.
Santa's house & reindeer: Featuring "Rudy the Tiniest Reindeer"
Santa & Mrs. Claus
Polar Express
General Store for kids to shop on their own.
Homestyle Candy Shop
Musical Water Show
Walk through Bethlehem with live animals and nativity

If you have a blog, Facebook page, or like to tweet, share your local favorites so others can join you!

What should we be doing in youth ministry?

2011-11-16T08:55:00.004-05:00

I found my self guided back to the center this morning, to a place where ideally I'd always rest. Hoping that in all of our efforts in youth ministry that we would be about the most important things. I found guidance in the chorus of a song I was listening to called "Search Our Hearts", by Trinity Grace Church. My husband and I watch their ministry, listen to their songs, and hope to be learn from this body of Christ as we grow up in the Lord. It wasn't surpassing to me that there would be instructions for my youth ministry written plainly in the lyrics.

If you're wondering what to do in your youth ministry. If you're wondering what you should be about day in and day out, then read the words in bold and let them inspire your questions. Youth ministry is about making life--through the miracle of Christ's redeeming love. I pray that we would always sing freeing songs with our students and replace lies with the truth so that teenagers would experience the healing transformation of grace...and that they would share it with others as they live in it for the rest of their lives.

search our hearts

search my heart
and make it clean
let it be
an offering
sweet and simple
unassuming

touch my heart
and give it words
to bring the light
to the cause
to offer up a blessing for a curse

and overflow
from these thirsty souls
that we might sing
freeing songs
speak healing words
live with clean hands
and heal this land
nursing its wounds
offering truth
instead of lies
and bringing life

form my heart
stir my soul
till your thought is my will
when you're speaking
i am listening

you fill our hearts with your design
and from our mouths
what you inspire
fills the world and offers up your grace

and overflow
from these thirsty souls

that we might
sing freeing songs
speak healing words
live with clean hands
and heal this land
nursing its wounds
offering truth
instead of lies
and making life

Pray: Justin Bieber and Youth Ministry

2011-11-10T15:43:00.004-05:00

I'm unapologetic about being a Justin Bieber fan. Let's face it, the kid rocks.

This music video is one more reason to continue my fan club membership.

I don't know if Justin is a Christian, but what I do know is that this message is absolutely at the heart of being a kingdom person. What if each of us, who knows Christ would pray this prayer: "how can I make a change".

My hero in the faith, the late Martin Luther King Jr. closed his eyes once too and he saw something different--and he prayed, not only with his words but with his life. Let's teach our teenagers to pray and to see a future where they make a difference for Christ in the tears and brokenness they find around them.

*Shout out to middle schooler Nicholas Ulloa who scouted this video for me. We'll show this during our polk project offering for homeless kids in our community. Thanks to you.

Leading up...when you feel like throwing up.

2011-11-09T15:30:00.006-05:00

This week I got to join Kurt and Jake on the Simply Show (watch it here). We talked a little about Arnold Schwarzenegger, Pauly Shore, people with two first names, basketball, grandpa's idioms, Austrailian landscape photographers, Fast Buck Freddies, what I'm not working on currently, the SYMC coming up, and some good things about what it means to be a leader in youth ministry.

I hope you'll check it out, enjoy the conversation and think about how you lead, wherever you are, and however you serve.

Happy Thanksgiving,

Brooklyn Lindsey

(Brooklyn is my first and only first name. Lindsey is my last name, which sounds like a first name and can be very confusing to some people. If you find this confusing, you can just call me Wilson.)

Sugar update. (See "I quit sugar" post) I'm doing great without it. I had a piece of pumpkin bread that a friend made, from a real pumpkin. People don't do that much anymore so it was cause for a break from the fast. But I feel good about it and I'm not tempted to dive back into the halloween candy. New habits are awesome. Enjoying feeling truly hungry again.

You are a child of God.

2011-11-01T10:47:00.005-04:00

I'm preparing a message for a young ladies conference happening this weekend. As I was sorting through papers tucked away for future reading, I discovered a piece that has sat quietly waiting to shine like a fine piece of silver covered in tarnish. This piece has reminded me and inspired me in different seasons of life and work--I believe it's words have the power to speak to us all.

Marianne Williamson from her book “Return to Love”

Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate,
but that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, handsome,
talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won’t fee insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

A Youth Leader's Struggle: Sugar Addiction

2011-10-31T12:44:00.009-04:00

Confession I've never talked about this before. I'd rather give a cat a bath then talk about food and my relationship to it.
But I feel like it'll be freeing in writing it, and helpful to someone
who may be struggling with the same thing.

I am a junk food junkie.
Sugar. Chips. Processed foods.

People debate on whether or not this is a disorder, an addiction,
a coping mechanism, a genetic trait.

For me, I don't really care what people call it. I call it a problem that has the power, if I let it, to define and defeat me.

I called my brother to tell him the other day that I felt helpless. I get busy,
stressed, and at night I find myself on the couch eating whatever I can find. And at this time of year, I find myself eating cookies, candy, treats, all day long and all night too.

I'm a thin person. I'm blessed with a good metabolism. I have been an athlete for most of my life. This isn't about weight gain or weight loss for me. This struggle is about the inability to control something that seems to have power over me. This struggle is about an inability to make good choices when it comes to my body.

I've prayed, I've fasted, I've tried a lot of things to help but always find myself in sugar binges that leave me feeling guilty, then apathetic. I start over. The cycle repeats.

Turning Point
It wasn't until this weekend when I sat with a friend talking about her hunt for a Reece's Cup. She sent her son to find her one at our Fall Party. I don't remember the whole conversation
but what it uncovered is that she struggles too. We agreed that are moments,
mid Reece's Cup when we are already thinking about eating the next one.

The Decision

So we decided we were going to quit. Cold turkey.
And I decided to start reading.

What I found helped me to see that there are so many people just like me, with the same struggle.
Youth ministry gives me every good reason to eat a steady diet of grease and sugar. There is a moment
when I need to overcome--to be a practitioner of faith--in front of my students.

Someday, I'll be able to control my sugar intake, but for now, I need to quit.
I want to discover a healthy pattern for myself and let my kids and students see me "faithing" before them.

Here's what I'm going to try:

I'll start with a wild and reckless trust that Jesus won't leave me.
I'll talk with a friend who will do these things together with me...

Eliminate obvious sugars from my diet.
Eliminate artificial sweeteners that bring on cravings.
Get more rest.
Eat often, never skipping meals.
Eat whole foods that aren't packaged.
Be accountable to someone.
(This has made a HUGE difference for me.)

I'm writing because I know, all of us are struggling with something.
We may pretend that whatever it is doesn't exist but it's ability to ruin our day, our mood, our ministry is proof that it does.

The Holy Spirit can speak to us and the Word of God can invigorate us and give us direction--but it becomes harder to perceive it's power when we are shielded with guilt and crouched in hiding. I'm not suggesting you broadcast your struggle--but start with a conversation with someone who may understand and who may be able to help.

Whatever it is that you struggle with. Tell a person that you trust.
I hid my pain in laughter and in jokes about what sugar does to me.
The Bible says to carry each others burdens...to confess so that we may be healed.

I'll be able to eat my kids' birthday cakes.
But for now, I need a little rehab and I'm finally not ashamed to admit it.

Do you find yourself struggling to eat healthy as you serve teenagers?

Games: Sharing Ideas that Work

2011-10-19T12:48:00.005-04:00

If you've talked to me more than three seconds, you'd know that I like sharing ideas. Actually, that's not being very honest.

I LOVE SHARING IDEAS.

In fact, I was on a short skype call this morning with a youth pastor that I meet in Oklahoma last week. Part of the deal was, we can talk about wufoo (an online form system we use) for a few minutes, IF you share your best crowd game with me.

Deal.

I told him what I would be doing tonight. A great game we played at the Middle School Ministry Camference called Ping Pong Palooza.
The way Kurt explained it to me, and the way we played it goes like this...

Everyone gets a ping pong ball. Everyone writes their name on the ball with a sharpie (first and last). There's a bullseye drawn on paper on the stage or at the front of the room. On the leader's count, everyone aims for the bullseye and tosses their ball. Closest to the pin wins (you can use a pin if you want or a sharpie marked circle on paper--we went with the paper). The closest three participants get to line up, put the ping pong balls in their mouths, for a one at a time launch to see who is closest. Prizes are lavished on both winners.

Brett Armstrong works at a church named after one of my favorite cars--Mustang Nazarene (how cool is that?) and he shared this epic crowd game with me. Some of the best games we know came from coaches, team building experienced, campy types of people. This is one of those--learned from a basketball coach at a camp he attended as a kid.

It's called:

FOLLOW ME

Put your phones away-we're not talking twitter. It's a game where you ask your students to ACTUALLY follow you.

Here's what you do (according to the mustang nazarene rule book).

Leader explains:

I'm going to do one of three things. You follow me in everything I do, except for one thing.
If I clap. You clap after me.
If I raise my right hand, you raise yours.
If I put my right hand down. You put yours down.
If I put my left hand up. YOU DO NOTHING.
Got it?

You clap. They clap.
If they clap late, they're out.
If you put your right hand up and tell them to put it down (while your hand is still raised) and they follow you. They're out.
If you put up your left hand and they put up their left hand (the only exception). They're out.
If you turn around and put up your left hand (giving some the indication it's your right hand) and they follow you. They're out.
You can also pretend to start clapping but stop short. If they clap when you didn't...they're out.
Keep playing until you get down to one.

I'm thinking this game will require some practice on my part. But I'm sure it's going to go over great. I can't wait to have fun with the students tonight. Maybe you needed a game like this just in time! Go for it and let Brett know how it worked for you.

We love our jobs. It shows when we can play and pray in ways that are creative and memorable. Keep sharing the ideas and have fun tonight peeps.

Game on.

Highland Park Saturday Night

2011-10-13T14:43:00.006-04:00

Our prayer for Saturday Night Church is that we would be...

..moving from maintenance to mission by taking risks to influence others to love God.

Here are 3 ways we can do it:

1. Lead with passion. God is looking for leaders who are passionate to serve. If the passion isn't there, then we need to ask why. Find a place to serve that brings out the passion in you. Without passion, a ministry will only be able to maintain. We want to move.

2. Take the next step. God has blessed all of us with great ideas. But, it's only an idea until we act on it. Taking the next step means doing what it takes to make an idea an action. With ideas and no action, a ministry can only maintain.

3. Do it for God's mission. God is on a mission in our world, and we can be a part of it. It's not about us and our fame. Some things we do will succeed, and some will not work. But if we try it for the sake of God's mission, it's never a failure. Allow God's mission to motivate us to take risks, and God will use to influence others.

Multi-generational Church Service: 6-7PM
Children's Ministry
Gobena Coffee
Middle School Ministry (Meets Wednesday's, Same Time Same Place)
High School Ministry (Meets Sunday's, Same Time Same Place)
Campus Co-Pastors Coy and Brooklyn Lindsey

Sometimes I get in the way, so won't you take the lead...

2011-10-12T16:51:00.003-04:00

"I could play the background, like it's an instrument."

I'm sharing this video with our middle schoolers tonight. Love the message. We used to live close to Lecrae in the DFW area, he came to our church and gave a great concert. One thing I noticed--he's not trying to be Hollywood. I appreciate that. Be real and be open to playing the background.

Give me some space | Making room for imagination in ministry

2011-09-30T04:15:00.005-04:00

My friend April recently posted some great photos of her kids on her blog. She captured pictures of her two doll baby children and their wonderfully creative sleep patterns.

For us, we might find some of these postures awkward (if not impossible!).
For them, it's just the way they do things. It's natural. It get's the job done.

So, I peeked in on my youngest tonight. In the darkness of her room I snapped a shot of her sleeping. I'll call this the rainbow position: back bend, hands over head, books and toys strategically placed...at perfect peace.

Since I am completely opposite of her right now--up at a ridculous hour--not able to shut my eyes to save my life--I find my own posture on my couch with my keyboard, finding rest in another way.

This got me thinking about ministry to young teenagers. (Almost everything gets me thinking about teenagers.)
On Wednesday night, I asked the question.
What blocks you from seeing Jesus in your life?
What is so loud and distracting that you forget about his living presence and work in your every day life?

I sat with a group of six middle school boys as they told me the same story about how they think about sports and video games but mainly it's their imaginations that distract them the most.

Hmmmm.

I wonder if our focus on grades in school, on standardized tests, and honor roll has limited our teenagers in their imaginations. These guys told me they just start thinking about stuff and they find themselves making up stories in their heads and chasing them around for awhile and before you know it, they've lost track of time.

I personally don't know any middle school student who doesn't get distracted.
Even the most organized, type A, disciplined student--I've seen him and her wander "somewhere else" and forget something important.

Imagination is God given. It's a wonderful thing. And I'm wondering if we limit it in the church like it's limited in schools for the sake of grades and keeping peace in the classroom?

I wonder if I've limited their freedom to understand God, the Bible, prayer, community to the way I see it and the way I know how to do it because, to be frank, it's just the way we've always done it.

What if teenagers are more like our infant and toddler children, growing in spiritual positions we could never imagine working at all, but it does.

I've got our Sunday morning discipleship hour on my brain. We've moved from a up front teaching time to an around tables with leaders guided study. We've seen some great changes and growth in doing this.

But I'm thinking maybe they need more space. Still.

Just as my youngest daughter has more space to sleep than she needs--it's totally necessary for her to grow, for her to find her own way of doing things, for her to rest. At the same time, it's necessary that the space to have some limits to keep her from harm.

I want to give teenagers the space to imagine their own ways of praying, reading the Bible, translating it from their context and applying it in ways that help them. I think they need more space to do that. I think they need us to ask them--"how would you go about praying or talking to a friend about God or serving others". Their answers might want us to get out our phones and take a picture.

After I get back from vacation, I'd like to do a few things:

1. Recruit two middle school girls, and two middle school guys to help me as I plan my lesson each week. Let them give me ideas for how to teach the material. Let them tell me what they think about the ideas before I tell them what I think about them.

2. Change their environments often. My girls bring all sorts of craziness into their beds to help them sleep. What would a teenager want to be in their space as they learn about Jesus. Find this out.

3. Take good notes. Listen to them by noticing what they draw, what lights up their faces, what causes them to turn inward.

4. Pray and ask God to open our eyes to see where we need to give space and where we need to provide protection.

I hope this is making sense. Any thoughts are welcome here....

Weekly Reminders & Encouragement

2011-09-27T21:05:00.002-04:00

Fill out my Wufoo form!

What I'll be when I'm 33

2011-09-22T10:03:00.007-04:00

The birthday is coming.

It has me thinking about what I want to be when I grow up.

If I live to be 99 years old, I've already lived one third of my life. If you're measuring out ingredients that's a big pinch gone to the pie. At the same time, there's quite a bit left that's needed to make this thing really great.

So what's this next 1/3 going to be about for me? Not sure entirely, but I am sure of a few things.

The list:

1. Stop trying to be a man. Everyone knows that trying to be a man is a huge waste of a woman. The next time I preach, I'm ditching the "everyone wears converse" look and wearing heels.

2. Buy a good pair of heels.

3. Be unapologetic about the fact that I don't have all of the answers, and also about the fact that I've got a few to share.

4. Enjoy working out. I don't want to do anything athletic unless it gives me life. I'm jumping off this Zumba train and getting back on the court. Maybe at 34, I'll enter a sand volleyball tournament with my brother somewhere, or train for the Olympics. Either would work for me.

5. Spend more time praying and connecting with the Holy Spirit of God than I do connecting with the spirit of facebook. I want to know the Word of God. I want it to pour out of me more than the latest Gungor lyrics.

6. Write something that matters.

7. Care enough to know what matters.

8. Give away things. Start with ministry resources. I've got tons to share. Email me if you need something.

9. Make happy memories with my children. Plan their birthday parties, make things at home, do things spontaneously, bake up the kitchen, throw spaghetti, dance, and play.

10. Make more happy time with my husband. This could include a variety of things but mainly I want the one you are thinking of. It's fun. It's important. God ordained it. Not ignoring it.

I'm confident in the person God created me to be. I'm grateful that I get to be a part of so many things that I love. I can't imagine my life without youth ministry, mission trips, baptisms, writing, training, meeting, talking...I also can't imagine my life without fun, adventure, my family, my husband, our call to serve and care for others. I can't imagine my life without reading, without being inspired by babies and nature, and really good stories. I hope we spend more time watching the sunset this year and praying for the people who the sun is rising for as we say goodbye to it for a day.

I hope that 33 is a year of giving--sharing--discovering--and living together in a way that gives people joy and peace.

It'll be great to be 33.

What will you be this year?

Training Our Leaders- In a Word

2011-09-21T10:57:00.007-04:00

CARE
When you arrive tonight for ministry. Make it your goal to CARE about the needs of at least one teen. Ask they how they are doing. Comment on what they are wearing. Compliment them. Our students are already facing stress as interim grades are out. Even those who are doing great academically may be facing friendship stress or general stress that goes along with changes related to growing up. Care by loving them--even while nudging them to pay attention during worship--it's all done with an attitude of "I get to point this student toward Jesus tonight".

Thank you for coming each week, to serve, to love, to be a Christlike example,and to say with your life "we care".

Hello Workload

2011-09-12T09:06:00.005-04:00

There are a few reasons I've been thinking about workload, how I handle workload, what to do with the workload...

Last week was my turn to preach at the Saturday night church where my husband and I serve as campus pastors--the topic of the sermon. Work.

Last week, we had a huge event that I had been planning for months. Crunch time had me thinking about work.

Our staff is looking ahead into 2012 and making ministry plans and goals. I've had to revisit my work to make sure these plans and goals are a priority. More work.

In all of this, I've leaned heavily on our youth ministry team--and on our assistant--Matt Fry.

Last Thursday morning, both of us felt like we had been punched in the face by youth ministry. We had an incredible circus event where teenagers enjoyed life together, laughed, and heard a message of hope. Good things came from this--too many to count--and we are grateful. But we still felt flattened a little by the steamroller called "Wednesday".

The cool part--we both felt this way. There's something about sharing a burden that makes it lighter.

Moses father-in-law gave good ol' Moses a lecture on this once.
(Exodus 18:17-18)

He said,

"What are you doing is not good."

Can you just see him sitting Moses down for a little talk? Shaking his head...

"You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out."

He noticed Moses trying to do things in his own strength.

"The work is too heavy for you: you cannot handle it alone"

Wisdom breathes.

The power in these words remind me how we need help. "Two heads are better than one", my teachers in school used to say during group projects. So often we want to own everything about our work and we forget the gains of sharing the load. We can't be afraid to ask our colleagues and friends for help. They may have the final piece to the puzzle or that key idea you've been looking for. Sometimes, all it takes is three minutes chatting with Matt to figure out a creative solution to a problem. Sometimes all it takes is airing a challenge before our staff. Sometimes, all I need is a few minutes to share my fears and frustrations with another human being--relieving the lonely feeling and gaining the support that comes with prayer and edification.

We are better together.

Why do I have such a hard time asking for help? Why do you?

Do we fear that someone else will get the credit for what we've done, or that we'll have to share? I'm guessing a little.
Do we fear admitting that we aren't perfect as we reach out for help or support? Sometimes.

Look to Moses, sitting as judge over Israel, helping people settle things from dawn until dusk every day, for an answer to your workload--get help. Allow others to lift you. Lift others when they are in need and remember it's God who we work for, not human beings. And it's God who we please when we do so.

I can't do this alone.

I need help.

I'm not perfect.

I still make mistakes.

Good ideas come from everywhere. I have a few, but there are so many more if I look around.

Some of my ideas stink.

I need people to tell me that.

Some of my ideas are great.

I need people to tell me that too.

When we go hard. We need help.

When we need rest. We need help to find it.

I hope as we face the work before us that we would never be lone ranger youth leaders. I hope that we would share the burdens, challenges, puzzles, questions, joys, parties, and wonders together.

Hello workload--we're ready for you.

Resurrecting your blog: 5 reasons to continue writing.

2011-08-29T14:42:00.005-04:00

I've slowed my blogging habits.

It's common for bloggers to have guest writers when they know that they are going to retreat from it for a period of time. I felt like I needed to simply let it rest. All of it. Including the scheduling of it.

I write because it gives me life. I write out of a deep desire to share and connect with others in a way that is symbiotic and enriching to everyone who would have interest in similar subjects. Ideas give me life, sharing them multiplies that life. However, sharing because that's what everyone else is doing is pretty junior high of me and I need to look at why I do this again.

Here are some reasons I've decided it's a good idea to keep writing.

1) Writing gives us creative space.

Sometimes, this is the only space I have that isn't scheduled. The only deadlines are the ones I give myself. The only topics are the one's I dream up. This is a way to express the God given image that each of us bear (as long as we are walking closely with the Spirit of God is should be revealing of God, no matter what we write about!)

2). Writing helps us leave an others-centered legacy.

Writing tells us of where we've been and what we've been about. It helps us with our priorities. When we are reflecting on the past it guides us in preparing for the future. I hope to give in ways that are sacrificial and abounding in love. If my blog doesn't reflect this type of legacy, I need to adjust things. I'm grateful for the record--even when it exposes personal weakness--because it opens the door for us to grow further.

3) Writing causes us to be quiet.

I talk too much. Idea people do this. Called people do this. We are compelled from places of passion and compassion. These are good things. But there are times when we need silence, solitude, meditation, to be filled again for God's service. When I sit down to write, the periphery dissolves and I can think clearly. Prayer happens easily and honesty isn't uncomfortable anymore, it's liberating.

4) Writing about our experiences helps others.

I remember learning the Wesleyan quadrilateral in college and seminary. It's a methodology for theological reflection accredited to John Wesley. In this method, we can come to theological conclusions by way of examining Scripture (The Bible) , Reason (rational thinking and interpretation), Tradition (the history of the church), and Experience (a persons journey with christ, both individually and as a community.)

I have learned so much from the experience of others in ministry. The first five years in ministry were for me, a giant season of observation and application, testing and experimenting. While I still observe and still try new things. I've started to move into a season of sharing that helps others. It's a wonderful season when you can give out of a healthy indebtedness, out of a grateful heart--knowing that others will be using your experiences to shape their present and newer ministry contexts.

5) Writing can be a testimony of the Holy Spirit of God at work in us and through us.

If we're being honest, we know that anyone on the planet can start a blog. You don't have to be smart, or good looking, or an expert at anything. Anyone can write a blog.

The difference are those writing with the miraculous power of God alive in them. Writing about the changes that happen because of this work, the miracles that result because of this Presence, the joys that are found (even in pain) due to the knowledge we gain are all things that can't be duplicated. These are things, if shared, that can change the world around us. The sharing of these things can cast the vision and mission of God by way of example.

I'm going to keep writing for these reasons. I may not be here every day or even twice a week. But I'll be here. Especially when the wind of God's Spirit shifts and we we see fruit. Stay faithful. It's your experience and mine that shows others the visible signs of the Kingdom on earth.

Keep writing.

Who do you work for?

2011-08-15T08:57:00.003-04:00

King David asked me a question today.

You, oh youth worker (pastor, parent, friend), hear these words and tell me....
who are you working for?

Psalm 127

Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain.
Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.

In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat--for he grants sleep to those he loves.

Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.

Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth.

Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.

Then, I read his prayer in 2 Samuel 7:18-28.

Then King David went in and sat before the Lord, and he said: “Who am I, Sovereign Lord, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? And as if this were not enough in your sight, Sovereign Lord, you have also spoken about the future of the house of your servant—and this decree, Sovereign Lord, is for a human being!“What more can David say to you? For you know your servant, Sovereign Lord.

“For the sake of your word and according to your will, you have done this great thing and made it known to your servant. How great you are, Sovereign Lord! There is no one like you, and there is no God but you, as we have heard with our own ears.And who is like your people Israel—the one nation on earth that God went out to redeem as a people for himself, and to make a name for himself, and to perform great and awesome wonders by driving out nations and their gods from before your people, whom you redeemed from Egypt?

You have established your people Israel as your very own forever, and you, Lord, have become their God.“And now, Lord God, keep forever the promise you have made concerning your servant and his house. Do as you promised, so that your name will be great forever. Then people will say, 'the Lord Almighty is God over Israel!' And the house of your servant David will be established in your sight.

“ Lord Almighty, God of Israel, you have revealed this to your servant, saying, ‘I will build a house for you.’ So your servant has found courage to pray this prayer to you.Sovereign Lord, you are God! Your covenant is trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant.

I begin to hear the echo in my soul. Then a reading moving further in...

A prayer from The Imitation of Christ by Thomas a Kempis.

Confirm me, Lord, by the grace of the Holy Spirit, and give me grace to be strong inwardly in soul and to cast out from it all unprofitable business of the world and of the flesh, that it may not be led by unstable desires of earthly things. And grant that I may behold all things in this world as they are--transitory and of short abiding, and I myself also to pass away together with them, for nothing under the sun can long abide, but all in vanity and affliction of spirit.

Therefore, O Lord, give me true heavenly wisdom, that I may learn to seek you and to find you, and above al things to love you, and to understand and know all other things as they are, after the direction of your wisdom, and not otherwise. And give me grace, also, to withdraw myself form those who flatter me, and patiently to tolerate those who grieve me so that the way I have begun will bring me to a good and blessed ending.

We will sing your praise, with our strength, with our voice, with our lives...without end.

God's love reaches out and asks for us to be present--to be available for him to transform us--allowing his spirit to work gently and deeply with in us--sharing with us. That we would be FULL of his Spirit and enabled to do IMMEASURABLY MORE than we could ever ask, or think, or even imagine, in Jesus' name.

*My daily scripture reading and reflection comes from a book I've been using for ten years this January. A Guide to Prayer for Ministers and Other Servants. (Shawchuck & Job) I owe many thanks to a mentor during our senior year of college for recommending this to us and helping us enter into community, solitude, and spiritual formation from a young age.

Why?

2011-08-13T08:34:00.004-04:00

Our four year old daughter woke up like she always does--before the sun comes up and speaking in full 10 am voice. It's our day to sleep in a little longer so we let her go downstairs to color, play, and continue to make noise while we try to squeeze in every ounce of rest before the little one hears the older one and wants to join in. Maybe you understand?

I couldn't stay in bed. I kept hearing cupboards open and shut. I found Kirra coloring, she had already finished three pictures by the time I made it downstairs.

I prepared some cereal for her and a cup of tea for me. Turned on some music that while she ate and played.

Que the questions.

Kirra has been asking a lot of questions lately. I'm pretty sure this is a great sign that she's growing developmentally but it's also why I have these random grey hairs cropping up all over.

This morning was the most rapid fire questioning to date.

"Why do we have names?"

So people will be able to know who we are. (Hey, my best answer that early in the morning!)

"Why do people need to know who we are?"

"What does check-in mean?"

It means to sign in somewhere with your name.

"Why do we need to sign in?"

So everyone knows who is at a place.

"Why do we need to have name tags?"

"You thought having kids was a good idea. Why was it a good idea?"

"Why is daddy still sleeping?"

"Why is there music playing on your computer?"

Daddy and I were listening to this worship song last night.

"Why were you up last night?"

"Can I play with Play-doh?"

And there were more.

The thought I had while getting questioned by my sweet girl was this.

Why do we struggle with the question "why"?

A child is so unashamed to ask "why".

A key question learned in a curriculum design and instructional development course I took was the question "Why do you do what you do when you do it?"

What if we walked around for an entire day asking "why"?

Why do I wake up in the mood I'm in?
Why do I eat what I eat?
Why do a think about what I think about?
Why am I worrying?
Why am I doing the busy work and avoid the important work?
Why am I avoiding that conversation?
Why haven't I called or connected with those closes to me today?
Why am I obsessed with finding chocolate to eat at 2 PM.
Why do I love listening to music all the time?
Why do I read five books at once?
Why are people so important to me?
Why are we drawn to take this risk?
Why do I feel the need to clean out my closets?
Why does my husband constantly give things away?
Why is prayer something that I let get pushed by other thing?
Why does it bother us to pay so much for gas?
Why is it so much fun to play on the floor with children?
Why do I love hearing children pray?
Why does laughter make us feel better?
Why does hanging out with our neighbors give us life?
Why am I think about the question "why" today?

I think we we really answered this question and answered it honestly, many of us would find that we might be drifting into some unhealthy rhythms. We might find some really healthy things going on in our lives but we need to make room for more of them.

Ask yourself "why" this weekend. Why in your ministry. Why in your family. Why in your spiritual life. Why do you do what you do when you do it? It's a question that would fare well when asked in community. Just like I'm helping Kirra see things from my angle, others can help us see things from theirs. It's enlightening.

Make a list.

Question.

Share it with others.

You might find some important things along the way and enter into deeper rest, deeper purpose, and deeper passion for living.

Why is it a good idea to have kids?

Because they help us with our stuckness. They ask the right questions. They are very in touch with their feelings and emotions. They aren't afraid to ask.

If you don't have children--it becomes even more important to be a part of a community where children are included. We nurture them in many ways, but they equally contribute to the joys and learning that happens.

Thank you God--for Kirra--who isn't afraid to keep asking "why".

Save the hand cramp | Paperless Youth Ministry

2011-08-11T12:56:00.004-04:00

Over the last year our youth ministry has slowly become paperless. We do our events, camps, mission trips, RSVP's, waivers, payments, everything...if you can sign up for it, we can make an electronic form. And WE ARE LOVING IT.

Gone are the days of trying to read the chicken scratch-just too excited to write legibly handwriting coming in from our students at the beginning of the year (not to mention the wobbly-not so sure of themselves-too distracted guest student handwriting)

Yay for us (and for them too. No one like when we have to call mom to figure out if the email address reads "mightykiddrinksmonster@middleschool.com" or "mightykidringsmonster@middleschool.com")

Middle school teenagers who call Lakeland home and want to register for ministry with HPNY this year. Click HERE.

KICK OFF IS WEDNESDAY AUGUST 24TH there WILL be a line to register so save the hand cramp for school and register today!

FREE HPNY SHIRTS given to those registering online -- available at our MAIN EVENT- COME ONE, COME ALL on Sept 7th. More on that later.

Oh, we are not chained | A Community Song

2011-08-08T22:03:00.005-04:00

In five days--we get to relaunch--Highland Park Saturday Night. We've been listening to music, reading books, huddling up with friends and passionate ministry leaders from our church for months and it's cool to know that we get to start, finally. There's still so much to do, but that's the amazing beauty of church. We are the church. TOGETHER. And, it will take the church to make the vision of moving from maintenance to mission a reality. So, we'll start with a song. Jessica Davis will lead us in a song that we hope will echo the cries and shouts of our hearts. We'll dive right into a new church wide series as well. Hope to see you Saturday at 6. Oh, it's also Date Night. That means, if you bring your kids under age 9, you can leave them with us until 10 PM. Yep, free childcare. Need a remedy for insanity? Go ahead and check that one off of your list. See you soon.

Let It Shine
Leslie Jordan and David Leonard
© 2011 Integrity's Praise! Music/BMI and Integrity's Alleluia! Music/SESAC CCLI#5881075

There are a million truths for every lie
So speak it out loud and let it lift high
There are a million reasons to cover your eyes
But the light is shining through the darkness we hide
But the light is shining through the darkness we hide

So come let it
Come let it
Come let it
Come let it shine

There's only one way to wash yourself clean
So let the dirt fall and get on your knees
There are a million scars for every mistake
Oh but we are not chained to the secrets that we've made
Oh but we are not chained to the secrets that we've made

This is the battle of our time of our time now
We can't afford not to cry not to cry out
Shake the earth from the ground from the ground
Rescue souls from the darkness around

Come let it
Come let it
Come let it
Come let it shine

I err therefore I am.

2011-08-02T08:55:00.003-04:00

Kathryn Schulz just rocked my morning. If you're human. You should take a few moments this week to remember how great it is, when "something else happens instead".

"Rediscover wonder by stepping outside of that tiny terrified space of rightness and look around at each other...and look out at the vastness and complexity and mystery...and be able to say wow, I don't know, maybe I'm wrong."

Two Minute Tip: We need help.

2011-08-02T07:59:00.008-04:00

Volunteer leaders give us extra heads, hearts, and hands to do ministry.

They have an arsenal of abilities and passions that compliment everything that's done. I was reminded of this at camp this week. I lost my voice (sort of an important thing to have at youth camp) and my leaders became my voice. The cool part; I didn't have to tell them much, they already knew...because we've spent countless hours together. I can honestly say, I LOVE THEM.

I hope you love and care for those who support you in ministry, even if their ideas don't always match up with yours. It's biblical to admonish and encourage each other in this way. A cord of three strands is pretty stinking hard to break.

If you'd rather hear this straight from my strained voice, day-after-camp face, here you go.

Now get to it, love and use those leaders.

Get ready for camp. What to pack.

2011-07-24T20:52:00.005-04:00

I leave tomorrow for my eleventh season of summer camp. Contrary to what one might think, one can not only survive summer camp--she (or he) can also thrive while being there...especially if you've packed the right stuff. (An old NKOTB song just rang in my head, don't hate...participate.)

A few essentials:

"That One Thing"-Lucky bandanna, t-shirt, or van mascot. This item is that one thing you've taken to camp every year and have found some awesome use for in a pinch. For me, my one thing is music. When people are getting rowdy I throw on some music and it usually unifies us and organizes some of the energy.

Double Stuff Oreos. If they aren't double, don't bring them. It's against the law.

Tums. Enough said.

12 T-shirts. Five for you, three to change into just in case one might get wet, creamed, tagged, etc. The other four are for the beach or lake--you'll give these away to whoever might desperately need them...

Sharpies. Don't plan on bringing them home.

Tape & Scissors. Girls always need this stuff. I can almost set an alarm for the first requests...three minutes after move-in.

Change. Our guys find the soda machines quicker than girls can look for tape and scissors. They usually come to a leader with a $20 bill wanting change because they are "dying of thirst". So I bring $10 in quarters and offer to them for free in exchange for no pranks and no smelling up the vans. Works. Sometimes...

Work Out Clothes. These will never get used but at least you made the effort.

An Entourage. Never, I repeat NEVER, go to camp alone. Bring your best adult leaders, train them, set them loose to have fun and share the week. It'll change everyone's experience--the more you have, the more you'll thrive.

Resources. Take your "go-to" help resources for students who will be struggling. A good study Bible, The book, "Helping Teenagers In Crisis", and if you have access to the internet--a laptop or iPad--it's great to be able to show a teenager things they can get involved in or be a part of right away.

A Piece of Home. Bring something that reminds you of where you're from and from what you lead out of. Sometime throughout the week, you will have an opportunity to minister to someone because of who you are, who you were, and who you want to be. Don't hide out trying to be something you're not. Be yourself and you'll be seen as real and be able to connect in relevant ways.

Read. "The Volunteer's Back Pocket Guide to Events & Retreats: Necessities for Volunteer Leaders" By Johnny Scott and talk it over with your leaders before you leave. I love the chapter, "Things your youth pastor wants to tell you but doesn't have the time...or the guts!" It's amazing. Pick it up asap.

There are other things, you know, thinks like deodorant. But you get the big picture.
Plan ahead and you'll have a great week. Meaningful, memorable, and life-changing.

So, I'm heading off to camp...I'll let you know how many Oreos we pounded if you promise to post your top camp gear! Have a great summer.

Use Short Words - Preaching that Connects

2011-07-23T23:41:00.004-04:00

A few years of a great religion degree can lengthen the words in your vocabulary. This isn't a bad thing. I love words. I love to use new words, especially after I've learned to understand what they mean! One of my favorite words learned in undergrad was the word concomitant. It's a word that means that something naturally occurs together with something else, or follows it. I loved learning this word because it helped me understand how God does multiple works of grace in our lives--at the same time--justifying us completely as well as sanctifying our hearts by the truth.

This is meaty stuff. Awesome to talk about, except such words signal passivity. They leave a listener with abstract ideas--unable to connect them with the needs they have and want to deal with.

Over the years I've had to learn to let the temptation to sound educated die. It hasn't been easy. It's a struggle not to default to what we've learned formally in books, blogs, and bachelors degrees. But it has worked, to return to short bursts of clarity, bright and powerful words placed intentionally together that help a listener to GRASP the power of God's story involved in their lives.

Our ministry isn't understanding and being able to articulate theological terms in the right context and with the proper pronunciation (while it is supported by it) Our ministry is found in connecting with the listener.

Preaching that loves knows this. It's a practice in self-denial. To think in terms of the other. To be clear, to be connecting, to be vulnerable--all the while being rooted in Scripture and open to the work of the Holy Spirit--this is opposite our desire for others to hear our concerns, our study, our perspective.

I know if what I have to share, is about Christ and making him known clearly--then the work will also be done by Him. This knowledge frees me to speak with authority. It removes doubt and we find ourselves being able to connect at another level.

The next time I'm tempted to be pithy or to "wow" an audience with how much I know (which takes quite a bit of doing as far as I'm concerned), I ask for God to correct me. To line me up with the heart of Christ. Empty me. So that I can preach the Word clearly and with authenticity. Thinking of who is hearing and how they may be receiving it.

"Jesus wept". This story, this line of God's Word is one of the most clear and concise Scriptures in the Bible. It tells the whole story. It reveals. It connects.

We can always make more room for God as we pray that he would become greater (John 3:30) in our ministries. And as we become less...God will continue to refine us to be great communicators of the Kingdom--connectors to Christ and his great love.

In this case, less really is MORE.

Poetry Bombing: Watch out, you could be next.

2011-07-12T11:41:00.005-04:00

A good friend of mine, Jessica Erin Davis, (who happens to be one of the most inspiring worship leaders that I know) sent me a link to a new blog where I found this AMAZING girl who is poetry bombing the daylights out of the hand-me-downs found at thrift stores.

It gave me an idea...what if the words of Jesus were spread this way? Maybe someone is already doing this? But I love the idea and am dying to try it. Guerilla love to the unexpecting. Sew Jesus. Marvelous.

What now? How to be the church once you've decided to be a part of it.

2011-07-12T08:27:00.006-04:00

I just came from an incredible week with nearly 7,000 high school students at an event called Nazarene Youth Conference. It cycles around every four years. Each event is held in a different city and each event has it's own feel with a new generation of high schoolers filling the place.

For me, being on stage, speaking, and interacting with the students was extra exciting because sixteen years ago I sat where they sat. I felt what they felt. I experienced life altering moments with God that shaped my future and helped relieve my fixation on the past. How freeing it was! How messy it was! How defining it was to hear the voice of God telling me why my heart beats the way it does....wow.

So--it's been a trip this week (to say the least). Grateful. Thankful. Excited about integrating youth into the body of Christ.

I feel like there may be some teenagers who walked away with an amazing experience but who are also very new to the Church and to the Christian faith. It doesn't take denomination membership for Christ to work and move in your life but the body of Christ is such an important piece of us that we may need to talk about it more--to help you, to help us. It might be good for you to know what your church believes now that you want to be a part of it. I'll use what we who are involved in nazarene youth international believe as framework--but if you're a part of another denomination, keep reading and use these things in your context.

1. The church values young people.

The church believes that young people are significant in the kingdom of God. And it's not just lip service.
There are eight nazarene colleges and universities in USA/Canada seeking to connect education with a lifestyle of service. this week they gave $40,000 scholarships to students. So if you live near California, Idaho, Oklahoma, Kansas, Ohio,, Illinois, Tennessee, Massachusetts, or Canada. Check one of these out, or a school like them, to see how God might stretch your imagination and learning opportunities through Christian higher education.

2. We value the Bible.

Crazy isn't it? But it's TRUE. The church values the Bible as God's unchanging truth for our lives. Word.

3. We value prayer.

He promised that his presence would never leave us. We believe that and know that when we gather together in prayer--Christ really is there! Prayer is a vital interactive communication with the Creator of us all.

4. We value the people called "the church".

I don't want to be a part of any organization that thinks that teenagers should live in faith a part from the body of Christ. No one was meant to live in faith alone. The church is a global community of faith--set apart--diverse in culture but one in Christ.

5. We value worship.

There should be life changing encounters with an intimate God wherever we find ourselves praising Him. Not every church is where they want to be on this--but worship at it's core is a posture--and attitude of the heart and that attitude is the most valuable key to surrender, to being shapeable, to listening.

6. We value discipleship.

I struggle with this word. It's tough because it's hard to measure as the world measures. Discipleship--is not only a hard word to spell but a hard word to talk about. If we are teaching a lifestyle of becoming like Christ then our main effort should be in practicing it together. I've seen many youth groups across the country and around the world embrace this teachable spirit of becoming like Christ TOGETHER and it is working!

7. We value community.

There's no doubt that there is a desire to build relationships that help bind us together and to God. I think of a cord of three strands, I think about the nature of love, I think about how the body works to edify and encourage...community is a big part of this.

8. We value ministry.

We challenged students to be a blessing. We are called to be a blessing! This is what ministry is, extending God's grace to our world-in every way that we encounter it.

9. We value witness.

Who is sharing God's love in word and in their actions? Teenagers can do this--together with all of us--we can share the hope that we have found in outward ways.

10. We value holiness.

Holiness is so much more than long hair and long skirts. It's a work of grace where God, through the work of the Holy Spirit, gives us the ability to live a life free of sin--the thing we don't want to do but do sometimes because we've been broken--this work enables us to live as representatives of Jesus Christ. This is good news!

I love seeing the church develop and mentor young leaders. I love seeing the church embrace unity and diversity in Christ. I love seeing the church connect in it's gifts to enhance the development and the deployment of young people to serving God. Where this is happening, this is where you'll find me.

I hope this helps some students who may not know what it means to be a part of a church. Regardless of denomination, this is where we should be camping out--often.

Meet Pastor Coy

2011-07-03T10:20:00.001-04:00

I'm married to a pastor.

When I married Coy, I knew what I was getting into because he told me from the start that God had called him to be an evangelist. God called him to preach when he was four. I couldn't argue with that. But I also thought, with is basketball abilities, that he may have to forego his call to take a job with the NBA. That's wouldn't be so bad either.

When I explained to my dad that my future husband planned on being an "evangelist" he was hesitant. "He's going to be a what"? At the time, I didn't even know what being an evangelist meant. I had really only been a Christian for about five years so it was that sort of zealous faith and a friendship set on fire (love) that allowed me to trust that being the wife of an evangelist would be just fine.

After finishing college and getting degrees in church ministry Coy found himself in seminary and I found myself in the church, doing youth ministry...why not?

Over the past decade I've become a youth pastor. I cherish the ability to influence the hearts and futures of teenagers for Christ.

After seminary, Coy chose to stay at home with our first child, Kirra. He saw how God was blessing me as a pastor, leader, and writer and wanted to support me in that. He was really looking forward to working in the church when Kirra went to school.

Then along came Mya. Our surprise cherub--who we adore. Her arrival meant a few more years for Coy at home. So I had a called minister, successful athlete, seminary graduate, ordained elder, and inspired leader on my hands--joyfully serving our family--waiting for his turn--and honestly I wasn't sure how he this would all work out.

Enter an opportunity. Our church has multiple services and two campuses. Over time our church leadership has entrusted my husband to be the campus pastor for our Saturday night community. As he has grown, as we have grown together, we are looking forward to yet another opportunity to, in essence, plant a church (within our church)--to co-pastor the body that worships at Highland park on Saturday night.

What I love about this is that we will still be Highland Park Church. We will still be under the leadership and guidance of our pastor. We will have a chance to take risks, try new things, and to see what we are made of...together.

This is an exciting, scary, out of my comfort zone time...I'm a youth pastor (and will continue)...but we'll be learning new things--in a new context--with new challenges.

I'll be posting more as things come together, as we pray, as we plan. Coy will be doing exactly what he told me he would be doing the day I met him. He has never waivered. His call has been constant and he has never stopped learning and growing. I can't imagine waiting for ten years to do the ministry God has called me to do! It's been in his waiting, in his perseverance, in his level of integrity, character, and confidence that has revealed the heart of a budding leader and pastor.

Coy--you've always followed me and supported my cause, and I want to return the gift. I trust you. I'm excited to see how God uses you to build a community that moves from maintenance to mission...and I'm thankful for our church. Our leader, Brett Rickey, who believes in young pastors enough to know when it's time to stretch us further. And I'm stoked to be doing this with friends, worship leaders and church members who get what it means to join in God's mission together. Grateful.

Coy shared a song with me that he discovered while dreaming about what our service could look like. I believe it's energy symbolizes our spirit right now...

13 Prayers for 13 Leaders

2011-06-27T08:24:00.004-04:00

Over the weekend I had the joy of celebrating another year of ministry with some of our youth leaders. My face still hurts from the laughter that ensued. When you spend time in ministry together, friendship is inevitable. I value the people who make reaching out to teenagers possible and am excited to be working with them again for another year.

I had our leaders give me a verse that I could pray over them while we serve together.
I'm reading them for the first time this morning and I'm blessed to speak these powerful words into their lives and families.

You have people in your life that you care for deeply...maybe you find it difficult to know what to pray. Why not ask them? Find out the verse that they've been sitting with lately and write it down. The Word of God is always a great place to start.

Joel:

"You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit--fruit that will last---and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you." John 15:16

Cherie:

"Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

Christina:

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up: do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19

Tracey:

"For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do no fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13

Debbie:

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own understanding." Proverbs 3:5

Kevin:

"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." Matthew 6:33

Cheryl:

"Don't be afraid, for I am with you! Don't be discouraged, for I am your God! I will strengthen you and help you! I will hold you up with my victorious right hand!" Isaiah 41:10

Kristin:

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores MY SOUL. He guides me in paths of righteousness, for his names sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, you anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever!" Psalm 23

Tom:

"This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life." John 3:16

Brittani:

"When I am afraid, I will trust in you." Psalm 56:3

Erika:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes fear the Lord and sun evil. This will bring health to your body." Proverbs 3:5-8

Tomy:

"Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Take to heart these commandments that I give you this day. Impress them upon your children. Recite them when you are at home and when you are away, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a symbol on you hands and on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates...." Deuteronomy 6:4-12

Mendy:

"He has shown you, O Man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God." Micah 6:8

I pray these words over you today and believe in faith that God's is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ever ask or think. May you feel them alive in you as you serve your family, your neighbor, and your church.

How We Envision The Church

2011-06-21T07:31:00.002-04:00

My husband found this video last week and I'm pretty sure I've watched it every day since he shared it with me. I pray that our worship would be just as sincere and vulnerable.

Calling All Artists | "O Darkest Night" from Trinity Grace Church on Vimeo.

Setting the stage for a "world unbroken"

2011-06-14T21:46:00.002-04:00

In just a few short weeks I'll have the honor of welcoming over 6,000 high school students and their leaders to NYC2011 in Louisville, Kentucky. What excites me most about this is that it was this same event that started a chain reaction in my heart for God. It was at NYC that I heard Tony Campolo, Laurie Polich, Marvin Daniels, and Gary Sivewright. Each of these speakers, through the work of the Spirit, changed the course of my life. To be a part of this for someone else is more than gratifying, it's soul satisfying.

We'll be talking about what it means to live in a world unbroken, a world God intended all along. If we really believe that God is redeeming us and the world, we have to respond to the call to be a part of it. God is dreaming in us all ways to remain in Him--and to use our gives to give back. If we really believe that there is a hell--both on earth by way of sin and in eternity by way of forever separation from our Creator, we also have to acknowledge that Jesus has overcome the world and conquered sin. God is making all things new, liberating lives from bondage, giving us hope, and calling us to live in response to his beautiful, unconditional, far reaching, and indescrible love.

I am so unworthy. But I am grateful that he loves me anyway and has given us this voice. It's time for a world unbroken.

Treasure Found: Walk-In Video

2011-06-08T15:10:00.006-04:00

It's rare that you find a video perfect for "walk-in" (the time when you open the doors for teenagers to walk into their space) I enjoy finding those that you don't have to edit, add music to, crop out ads, ect.

In my mind, a walk-in video needs to have a few things.

1. Energy
2. Appeal
3. Great music
4. Be more than a minute long but less than three

I found a winner today. Can't wait to use it tonight.

Extremities from Eli Stonberg on Vimeo.

Words To Build a Life On

2011-06-06T15:13:00.002-04:00

Hello, this is the anthem of my heart and the anthem of our ministry this summer. May God's story, written in our hearts, be the story we build our lives on.

5 Signs Of Maturity In Ministry

2011-06-03T22:42:00.004-04:00

How do you know that you've matured?

You make better decisions? You refrain from going the extra mile in the most recent dodgeball tournament by leaving your uniform at home? You resist the urge to ding dong ditch your neighbors with the really LOUD and early rising dogs?

I'm not really sure what gives us the maturity badge but I do know some signs of it that have showed up in my life and ministry. They're good indicators that I've grown a lot and that I'm rising to another level of godly leadership.

1) Less Knee-Jerk (or less jerk in general)

There have been moments when I've sat in meetings, overheard a conversation, absorbed a decision made by someone else, and made a knee-jerk judgement. Following the judgement usually came a quick draw action on my part that lacked tact, discernment, and spiritual wisdom. It's been in the recent years of my ministry where I've seen myself observe for longer, ask better questions, check my facts, probe a little before making a judgment. Usually, I find the answers I need before I do something stupid. We all know that stupidity gives us major immaturity points right?!

2) More Sleep and Less Sleep

I used to lose sleep over things like the lights not working, volunteers not showing...you know, all of the "important" stuff. I know that I'm growing up and moving inward and closer to the heart of God when those things don't keep me up at night anymore. I'm able to rest in the knowledge of God's work and power to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine. Because it's in His power that we do things in the first place. I can sleep at night--until God breaks my heart for something that really matters like teenagers who are far from God or far from knowing how truly beloved they are...that's when I'm losing sleep again. But losing sleep because we have a great purpose to fulfill is true spiritual maturity as our priorities align with the will of God.

3) Competition Wanes

There's a natural competitor in me. Playing volleyball used to be my outlet for this edge of mine. When ministry became my life over organized sports, I brought some of the attitude in with me. Wrong! There's no place for it in ministry. (Ok, maybe there's a very small corner for it somewhere between angry birds and 30 Hour Famine Fundraising) Maturity comes when we seek to do things not for our own glory but for the glory of the Father full of grace and truth. When we start to become less, we know we're growing in maturity.

4) Job Description Fades

We'll always have specific responsibilities in ministry--areas of focus--and some things that only we can do. At the same time, it's easy to feel like certain jobs aren't our jobs because we don't get paid to do them. Early in ministry I'd mentally weigh what everyone else was doing in terms of time, investment, and inconvenience. "It's not fair" can sneak into the heart vocabulary and take up permanent bitter root residence if we let it. Maturity is visible when we aren't completely defined by our job description--it's more of a rudder guiding our ministry. When other things that fall outside of our roles, we help, if we can, if it's right. We are able to decide with wisdom, cheer, and zeal when it's time to do whatever it takes--helping the body as God gives us opportunities. We're mature when different areas of leadership become an invitation to serve.

5) No More Homework

I'm still guilty of bringing stresses from ministry home with me. How can you not? Our jobs center on hurting people, on problems needing to be solved, on serving others. It seems like I can always be doing SOMETHING. Wouldn't that be a mature thing to do--to utilize every minute to responding to the Body of Christ and to the context of your ministry? The opposite it true. While this is a valiant goal and the motives behind this way of life are pure. We are immature to think that God isn't able to do God's work without us for two hours a night while you read a book to your children, kiss your husband, or spend an evening with grandparents or friends. Mature ministers don't neglect the life they've been given, not allowing any area to become empty and void of meaning.

I still like to sing in my car like a 7th grade girl at boy band concert and I like to take chocolates from other peoples desks (not so mature) but I'm seeing some signs of maturity...seeing growth in some areas that will really make a difference in the ministry that God has called us to. So how mature are you?

Summer's Song

2011-06-01T14:08:00.003-04:00

This song is my new favorite. It will be the song in my jeep this summer, in my head working out, on my mind when I'm stressed. LOVE IT! Thanks Jamie and Tobster (can I call you that?) for bringing it.

Thinking of the year before 9th...

2011-05-30T14:18:00.002-04:00

I'm going to miss our 8th graders soooooo much. It's our last week together in the middle school ministry.

Yeah, I know, they'll just be across the hall but I'm having serious issues thinking about launching them into high school. We've had some amazing moments together (and not so amazing too). All in all we've grown a lot and we've decided to love each other no matter what...keeping on...not losing heart.

What I want to say is...

be yourself.
use your gifts.
outserve your leaders and parents.
don't be afraid.

Remember,
whatever comes tomorrow.
God's love is here to stay--it's the same yesterday, day, and forever.

Reminds me of a great song by Francesca Battistelli. I hope you'll let God's love be your blue sky ok. Love you all so very much. See you Wednesday night.

Pastor Brooklyn

HPNY SUMMEROLOGY: 2011 Calendar

2011-05-21T11:35:00.000-04:00

Office Temperature Set to EMO

2011-05-17T11:37:00.005-04:00

And here's why:

1) The cooler (bench) in my office, filled with leftover soft drinks from our golf tournament, was opened unsuspectedly by our lead pastor. I didn't know that cardboard + condensation + time= the smell of a junior high boys locker room. The tears you see in my eyes aren't from the heartbreak I will speak of later, but of the onion-sock smell up in my eye thanks to our curious leader.

Now for the real reason I'm emo today.

My students are graduating. Tonight I'll go to one of our middle school's 8th grade graduations. Our seniors are graduating--those who I've watched from a distance--who I've walked past, joking and laughing with like they'd be here for ever--kids I've known for years are packing up their rooms and memories for to head to college.

Now I know that this sadness/ happiness/ excitement/nauseousness isn't much to compare with what some moms and dads are feeling right now but it's still hard to think about.

Every year the same thing happens. I get excited about new students coming into our ministry while at the same time I'm stubborn, not wanting the mature ones to leave just yet (and by mature, I mean mature in comparison to what they were!)

I will miss every 8th grader who spent the last three years with me--even though they are merely walking across the hall to our high school auditorium. They are my "kids" and it feels good knowing that the time I spent investing in them will continue through our high school ministry. The seeds planted will bloom in their lives lived for Christ. The ultimate pay-off.

It's a good place to be. There are so many things to celebrate. But if you stood next to me tonight, you'd see a tear (or two) and you might just have to hug me and tell me that they are going to be ok.

I'll come back to my onion pit of an office knowing that there will always be days when I'm happy/sad and there will always be friends in ministry who feel the same way I do.

Two Minute Tip: Finish What You Start

2011-05-16T16:12:00.003-04:00

A difficult obstacle to overcome in day to day ministry is to finish things that we start. Ideas fly like nobody's business around here. Sometimes those ideas get started. Most of the time, the ones that get started die on the operating table (when louder things take precedence). But what happens when you dedicate time to finishing?

Greatness.

I've heard it said that the secret of our successes in ministry can be found in our daily plan or agenda. Do we make time in our day for our priorities, passions, and relationships?

What are you working on that needs to be finished? What keeps you in stall mode? Sometimes, all you need is a good reminder to....finish what you've started.

Brett Blondell, our friend and partner in ministry finished something he started working on this week. A really great worship song came out of his time spent locked in his office, just him and his guitar. So, enjoy this weeks' guest, his new song "The Hope", then get off the couch and finish something.

Scars That Speak | Leaders Who Listen

2011-05-11T12:50:00.005-04:00

She checked in last Wednesday night and one of our leaders put a wristband on her wrist. As she turned over her hand to fasten the band she noticed what looked like tiny razor cuts up and down the underside of her arm. The leader told me about it immediately. I know the student well. I also know that she is in Christian counseling at our church. She has a lot going on and we've made a way for her to get help--but somehow in the middle of a lot of "help" she still feels alone or like she has only a few things that she can control--one of them being what she does to her own body. The scars tell me that she feels alone and that she is desperately seeking for something to connect her with life again in a a way that doesn't feel forced. So many love her here. But who will love her when she goes home? Who will love her at school? Who will speak truth to her when she is surrounded by lies?

I'm praying for a friend to come into this sweet girls' life--someone who gets it. The movie "To Save A Life" is one of the few portrayals of the type of friend I'm thinking of. Someone who is a peer, but mature enough in their faith to know that gravity of one kind word, or the impact of an invitation to be with someone who is lonely or feeling dejected.

Maybe need to revisit how a teenagers every day living, walking, and being around others could literally change the course of another persons life--especially when that living, walking, and being around is infused with the love and hope found in Christ.

This girl has me thinking about Megan's work at Saddleback with "Life Hurts God Heals". There may be a need for it here. Maybe we need to go through the To Save A Life, Devo2Go again with our group. Or maybe, I need to share this story with our leaders and begin mentoring one student each to live this type of "lovestyle". This blog isn't a solution, more of conversation that needs to be cracked open again and the forthcoming thoughts implemented--immediately.

I'm sure there are others in the same boat, wondering where to start (again). There are others who are thinking about how to keep hurting kids from slipping away from our own ministries and care? What do we do on an ongoing basis to check the physical and emotional temperatures of our students? Maybe I should just ask them...novel right? I'll start with that and let you know how it goes. In the meantime, I'd love to hear how you're checking in with your kids and how you're helping those who are hurting.

Two Minute Tip: Slow Down

2011-05-11T12:39:00.001-04:00

Today's Tip (From Yesterday)

Video for Mother's Day | Mr T | Treat Her Right

2011-05-04T12:20:00.003-04:00

1) We will be showing this at youth group tonight
2) I will be learning the back up dancer choreography
3) I will have Matt Fry to thank for the tip on this gem, thank you Matt.

2 Minute Tip | Follow Up

2011-05-03T16:35:00.002-04:00

Powerful Post from Sophia Network | 7 Sins

2011-05-03T15:37:00.005-04:00

Today I read a review of the book

7 Deadly Sins Of Women In Leadership: Overcome Self-Defeating Behaviour In Work and Ministry

on the Sophia Network Blog. This review was helpful to me and I think it will be helpful to men and women alike as we take a look at our own patterns and how they might hinder or help us.

I welcome books that make me feel like a mirror is being held up, helping me to think about ways my own behavior and thinking hold me back in exercising leadership.

The blog submits that "it might be worth addressing what Kate means when she talks about ‘sins’s. Elaine Storkey helpfully sums this up in her foreword:

“Kate is not offering a diatribe of offences against God for which we deserve punishment. Nor is she cataloguing our moral ineptitudes in order to make us feel wretched. On the contrary, Kate identifies the nature of sin with the destructive patterns of thought and behaviour that thwart the leadership God calls us to exercise.” (p11)

As indicated in the title of the book, Kate identifies seven of these destructive patterns of thought and behaviour often found in women who lead. They are:

1. Limiting self-perceptions
2. Failure to draw the line
3. Inadequate personal vision
4. Too little life in the work
5. Everybody’s friend, nobody’s leader
6. Colluding and not confronting
7. Neglect in family matters

What "sin" do you find yourself meddling in as a leader?

Over the last decade I’ve waded in and out of each of these seven, letting each lap over me like water over toes, then limbs, then torso...the shock of each just as jolting as the cold as it crashing into your back as you turn to brace yourself for the next wave. But just like wading into the ocean, the cold can make us feel numb. We get “used to” the feeling and forget that we are near full immersion, that we are nearly drowned in these sins, that we are close to letting go and giving up because it seems too difficult to go back to where we once were, the place of zeal and confidence rooted in Christ.

Let us remember how surrender in a rip current helps us out. When caught up in something stronger than our own physical and mental strength, letting go and not fighting is the best possible thing. Letting the current spit you out sideways as you slowly approach the shore leaves you yards if not miles from where you first entered the water--but you see yourself living and the place from where you came and are able to rejoice because you know how to stay from the trap and help others avoid it too.

It’s the same for us, as we surrender our fears and habits to God, through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and the fullness of his love that we experience through Christ, that we have the strength, wisdom, and courage to lead well in ministry.

May we find ourselves in a posture of surrender in the presence of God, resisting temptation to be caught up in these currents that bind us, being able to grasp how wide, and how deep, and how long is the love of Christ, and may we find the courage to do the thing that is too big for us--because he is able to do so much more than we could ever ask or think.

A line to a beautiful song comes to mind.... “let’s risk the ocean, there’s only grace” (Sometimes, Crowder) Risk the ocean--but do so knowing it’s grace that gives us an ability to lead without drowning.

Click here for a free sample.

Better Communication with Your Kids | Fuller Youth Institute

2011-05-03T08:30:00.000-04:00

Communication with your kids doesn't have to stop or deteriorate when they become teenagers. Listen to this interview. It will help any parent see that communication really can be better through adolescence. Better Communication with Your Kids | Fuller Youth Institute

My cell phone is my Goliath :: Listening to the burdens of middle schoolers

2011-04-28T11:43:00.006-04:00

Last Wednesday I gave our students some time to think about the "Goliath" in their life, the thing that wants to take them down, the thing that seems to big for them to handle...their responses helped me, made me smile, and broke my heart all at the same time. I listed a few here.

Listening to their hearts is so much more important than reading that next book about how to do ministry or become a great leader. Those books are great and important, but there is a point where we simply must dive into the mess and swim in it. Consider this jump a full out belly smacker--this jump says "I'm listening and willing to help you with your giants."

criticism
people who judge
death, sad being alone
myself
time
judgmental
sneaking video games on the school bus
school & guys
insecurities
rage
criticism
not enough time
time
feeling left out, broken :(
sin, bad influences
judging people
my mom
cell phone
gossiping
a secret I will not tell anyone but God
judging people
when my grandpa died on my bday
5th Grade
being judgmental
distractions
fitting in
school
death of her grandmother
my words
my responsibility
drama
people who judge

Calendar Updates

2011-04-27T23:29:00.004-04:00

We are looking forward to a great summer. I put together a simple list of what we're working on. If you're a family in our church, please look at this list and message us if you have questions or would like to register for something. Wufoo sign up links will be available for each event or activity as they get closer.

Two Minute Tip: Believe in them.

2011-04-27T09:59:00.003-04:00

Here's a two minute tip for our leaders as they get ready to lead and hang out with teenagers tonight. I appreciate the tips coming from Youth Ministry Daily, thanks Doug and Matt for the inspiration.

What to do with all those peeps!

2011-04-25T21:26:00.004-04:00

Peeps. Not sure why they are so famous at Easter time. They're not so yummy. Pretty, but pretty gross if you ask me.

However, this chick found a way to turn them into a delectable treat.
Here's what to do with all of those crusty peeps laying around.

Gather up graham cracker squares.
Chocolate from the Easter Bunny or your kids' baskets.
Peeps.

Stack up ingredients in s'more fashion.
Microwave for 8-10 seconds.

Let thy mind and tastebuds be blown.
Bonus: smashing peeps is sort of fun and it'd also be a great name for your youtube band.

One Thing I Never Thought I Would Do

2011-04-20T13:26:00.004-04:00

When a teenager breaks your heart.

2011-04-17T21:58:00.004-04:00

A good friend dropped by my office last week to chat. I don't know if you can go into a deeper conversation nonchalantly but it's what we did. I think my mind has a way of protecting my heart from the heavy things so I can share them with others without completely losing it.

I told her the story of what happened to me my first year in youth ministry. As I was telling it, I realized that I haven't shared this with many people. It wasn't until then that I thought that maybe someone else needs to hear my story, about how a teenager broke my heart to the point where I questioned youth ministry altogether and wondered if I could really give my life to working with them.

Here's what happened--there's a lot more to it than this, and maybe I can share with you in person someday about the rest but for the sake of my point, I'll keep it short

March 6th, 2002, nine months after college graduation, and seven months into my first youth ministry I found myself sitting in my office at church over one thousand miles away from home listening to my mom cry on the phone.

His name is Denver. At the age of 17, he broke into my grandfather's home desperate for money and a car. My grandfather was out of town working but Mary Jo--his wife and our step-grandma--was at home. It was days before her body was found. Denver had used a cutco knife from the kitchen to slash her neck....twice.

I was in shock as I flew home for the funeral. It was my second time helping a family through a funeral. I would never have guessed that it would be for someone in my own family.

Unfiltered thoughts that ran through my head:
How could a teenager be so brutal?
What happened that made him so desperate?
Am I wasting my time with teenagers who ultimately will do whatever the heck they want anyway?
Why? Why? Why?
That kid is sick.

Our family had already been through so much. Just months before, my 17 year old sister gave birth to twins. She had to make the hard decision to take her baby girl off of life support when her lung collapsed. My first funeral was held in my parents living room with my family and the smallest little bag of ashes I've ever seen. It was heartbreaking. Suffocating.

Here I was, pouring my heart into teenagers when my own teenage sister needed me and another teenager who I wasn't related to was giving me every reason to quit my job.

But here's how the Lord works when a teenager breaks your heart--when you suffer through many trials--when you do things you never wanted to do---EVER.

He gives you strength and whispers purpose into your ear. In fact, it was these two events that I now say gave me the fire in my gut for youth ministry. God told me two things that day during the funeral that Denver caused:

1) Denver needs me just as much as you do.
2) You were created for such a time as this.

God told me three things the day I held my sister as she cried over her daughter's ashes.

1) Humans make mistakes, but I never do.
2) Love each other as I have loved you.
3) I wept with my friends and family. Weep with yours. You are blessed when you mourn because you will be comforted.

Over the years teenagers have broken my heart in other ways. The worst pain comes when you know a student is making progress, you see life change, there is hope. Then, they make a choice or decision that leaves me helpless to do anything. Usually it leaves them in a huge mess that I can't help them with. It's heart breaking.

But I know, as much as I know that God loves me, that God also calls us to the least of these. I know that God calls us to be Good News and preach Good News regardless of what we might get in return.

Our reward is in heaven. I forgive Denver for a senseless killing. I have compassion for Denver because I know that somewhere along the way a desperation led him to a life that he couldn't undo. My sister forgives me for not being around like I should have when her baby died. I was scared. I didn't understand my role as a pastor and leader if I couldn't even help my own sister. It was a similar desperation that led me to pray like I've never prayed for a clear call and strength to do what God has asked me to do.

God's love is revolutionary. We find it when we are desperately seeking it and when others are desperately seeking other things we've get eyes to see through the desperation to their hearts in need of Jesus, in need of the Kingdom, in need of love from people who understand it all.

If a teenager has broken your heart and you've given up. Don't. God has your heart. He gives you courage. He makes all things new. If you, like me, haven't backed down, you know that you've sort of set yourself up to be hurt. But at the same time, you've set yourself up to see the miraculous work of God in people's lives as you minister to them.

I never thought I would ever blog about Denver. But I know that forgiving him an forgiving myself have made this pastor real--alive--motivated--relentless--and humble. Praying that your broken heart would lead to the same things and more as you discover the riches found in Jesus the healer of broken hearts.

One thing I know...

2011-04-13T16:47:00.002-04:00

Life is too precious to waste time worrying about what other people think.

Do they know him?

2011-04-13T16:17:00.003-04:00

I've been spending a lot of time teaching the Bible to our students this year (go figure). We've been going through The Story, a teen edition of the Bible that is condensed into 31 chapters. We are on week 10--grappling with what it means to listen to God and know Him. This journey is changing us...but that's for another post.

As I thought about the text, video, and message for this week I couldn't shake thinking about Jesus. Maybe it's because Easter is just around the corner. Or maybe it's because our whole church is on a vegetarian Daniel fast and I have to continually seek Jesus to keep from cheating each and every day. Or maybe, just maybe it's because God is speaking to me about why I'm here doing what I do in the first place.

It's about Jesus.

If I'm not in a position ready to share the person and work of Jesus Christ with my students each week, I'm missing the point. Every now and then I think it's important to come right out as ask the group. Do you know Jesus?

Not, "do you know him like you know your teacher at school" know him. I mean do you KNOW him? Do you know him well enough that you could make a good guess at how he might respond in a situation. Do you know him well enough that your confidence is great because of who he is (not because of what you are not). Do you know that you can be forgiven and don't have to live in guilt? Do you know that if he sets you free, that you really will be FREE? Do you know that God is with you always and you are NEVER alone? Do you know that God wants to fill your life with PURPOSE?

I don't have a fancy outline tonight. I don't even have a great story to tell to hook their attention. All I have tonight is Jesus. A few verses from the Book of Romans that tell it like it is. A video sharing the story of a man (Samuel) who listened to God and knew him well, and a voice to share with a hundred or so middle schoolers about what their status is.

I'm ready again today to lead students to Christ just like I want to lead my daughters to Christ every day. It's a non-negotiable gig for me. I hope it is for you. If it isn't, then you should probably ask yourself why. Thank God for days like today--days of clarity, vision, and pure child-like trust that God can do what God said he would do.

A powerful story. In theaters this weekend.

2011-04-04T15:48:00.003-04:00

Common Denominators for Creative Meetings

2011-03-28T15:30:00.005-04:00

I'm a part of a group that works together to plan and pray for a summer high school camp that reaches about 25,000 high school students each year. Christ In Youth, the organization that pulls MOVE off every summer brings a few of us together--and we dive into Scripture and think of creative ideas to communicate the truths, challenges, and encouragement that we find.

After meeting twice, I started to formulate some ideas on why the incredibly productive two and a half days works so well (while having plenty of time for play and legitimate digression).

Here are a few things that meetings need. Thanks Eric and to the CIY team for leading the way in this.

1) Ice Shortages

Our waitress at Joe Mamma's informed us that there was an ice shortage at dinner during our first night together. It made for some funny commentary but it also reminded me that unexpected things like shortages of things you take for granted can get dormant minds working. When you hit a wall in a creative meeting and someone asks a critical question or poses an unexpected observation, you find yourself looking at the idea from a different angle. There was one section of our day that we devoted many hours to one specific message, it wasn't until the very end when someone gave a random piece of information that helped us turn the corner to a firm idea. Welcome the random. Welcome the unexpected, it breeds creativity.

2) Ice Breakers

"Your mom is like an iPhone...."

Ok, so maybe it wasn't the best fill in the blank analogy to get the meeting started. But things like this get our wheels turning and generate fresh ideas. I like ice breakers that take us out of our comfort zones. I'm HORRIBLE at writing analogy's. Mine are completely awful. But it's fun to hear the quick wit around the table and be grateful that we all bring something different. Give me a flip chart and a marker for a round of pictionary--on the other hand--and watch out! Open meetings with something fun or even a simple question (What was your worst job...ever?). And see how everyone lights up.

3) Ice-olation Stations

Not everyone processes and thinks the same. Give people with a need for tactile stimulation some legos to build something, play-doh to sculpt, or space to draw. Welcome sitting, standing, ceiling staring...as long as it's not too distracting (P90X mid meeting may not be a good idea).

4) N-Ice People

Get to know each other during the breaks. Pray for each other. Depth in relationships equals depth in understanding. There will be some random, half-baked ideas--a gift of meetings like this--but it's ok. Throw them out there to be built on or bushwacked because along the way something will bloom and it will be great.

5) Icing On the Cake

Wrap up the meeting with where you've been. List what you've accomplished and celebrate with a meal or some sort of shared sport. Tilly Ball is always fun. (If you'd like to know more about this made up non-sensical version of volleyball that our friend Lane Moss made up out of desperation you can email him lanemoss@gmail.com)

Thanks for humoring my "ice" outline. I'm pretending you're in my creative group and you don't really care that I'm random and happy and altogether addicted to dreaming for the Kingdom. Thanks for being a homie. I hope this helps.

Spring Training for Leaders | How to love and lead this spring.

2011-03-21T09:43:00.004-04:00

It's the Monday after spring break. This day marks the beginning of spring craziness in youth ministry. It's the time of year when our students (even the core kids) push and test the boundaries a little more. They are a hot soupy mess some nights and I want to throw ice water on all of their heads and sit them in front of a classical symphony orchestra to mellow them out.
Raaawr! Take that. (insert sinister youth pastor laugh that is borderline cuckoo)

I really do want to speak life over our students and believe that this year will be different. But one night on a middle school retreat last weekend has already convinced me that this season will repeat itself until Jesus returns and rescues us all.

It doesn't matter if you work with middle school students, high school students, or both. We need a little encouragement. A little training. And possibly some extra love and tender care from our support leaders and parents. Here's the advice I gave them this morning as we prepare for Wednesday night.

Spring Training for Leaders | 5 Things

1) Look for loners and talk to them.
2) Look for loud ones and help them to see how they can be leaders instead of being distractors.
3) Look for lovers and remind them that there is no purple at youth group (girls are pink, guys are blue, purple is not an option.
4) Look for low blows and help mean spirited conversation by interceding and redirecting. It may mean buying a student a coke and having a mentoring conversation.
5) Look for lifters. When you see the uplifters in our group, praise them publicly.

I hope this helps someone as they head into spring everything. It's helped me today.

Pretending to be strong | Listening to the burdens of teenagers

2011-03-19T22:26:00.005-04:00

Jessica Hagelgans is a student I met while speaking on her college campus in Boston a few years ago. She currently teaches geometry, precalculus, sixth grade math, and sixth grade Bible at a school for missionary kids and Third Culture Kids in Ukraine. Awhile back she observed a common denominator in her teen girls--a "be strong" at home and with friends--a pretending for the sake of others.

There frustration with "pretending" is something I think we can all understand. I'm not a certified counselor, nor do I have a degreen in psychology. What I do have is a little bit of experience with teenagers and some educated guesses--but most importantly a genuine desire to hear the burdens of our teenagers and respond to them. Here is Jessica's question and conversation with me and my initial response. I'm curious about what others might have to say on this. Please respond if you have an affinity with this question. Let's talk.

Jessica to Brooklyn:

In the past of couple years, I've had a few teen girls (high-school age) tell me of how they "need" to be strong, to appear happy, for their friends and family, when, on the inside, they are hurting, weak, sad, broken. They tell me that they are two different people--one person at school, and one person on the inside--and that they are "pretending" in some aspects of their lives (how they feel about others, etc.). They are tired of this facade, but don't know what to do. How do I respond?!

Brooklyn to Jessica:

Being strong is a good thing sometimes when you need to remain safe. What I mean is not everyone is safe to be vulnerable around. I learned this late in life. I used to let myself be open, sad, broken, and vulnerable around most people. The problem is that some people can and will take advantage of this and hurt you further. So, boundaries are important. (I'd recommend reading Boundaries for teenagers)

At the same time, it's important to have teenagers find people that are safe for them. For many students, a youth minister is a "safe" person. Some girls choose to be "strong" at home while picking friends to be their safeties. But we know that not every teen friendship is solid and safe. Some girls are "safe" at home and choose to be "strong" with their friends. Some girls don't have "safe" anywhere. In any case, I recommend finding one or two adult mentors who can be their go to people--their outlet for being open. Everyone needs a safety.

Ever wonder why it feels good to cry together watching a chick flick? It's because most females need that opportunity, it's built up in us....and it's safe to cry for a movie that has nothing to do with us because no one will ask questions. We all need a person or persons who will let us ask and be asked hard questions---let us cry our eyes out--let us be weak and still believe in us in the process.

You don't always have be a rock. It's liberating to teenagers to know that. It's also freeing to know that we always have God's strength when it's tough to be strong---but still giving yourself freedom and time to open up, share, lay down, cry, etc....around the safe ones.

I'm curious about other thoughts on this. Anyone?

Excellent Lenten Resource

2011-03-09T15:34:00.000-05:00

Youth Ministry Resources & News: YMtoday.com

Where we'll be...this Friday!

2011-03-09T10:09:00.001-05:00

What's Up Wednesday | Lent

2011-03-09T08:37:00.007-05:00

What's going on in my brain as I get ready to talk to teenagers today.

The Secret of a Happy Life

2011-03-08T23:15:00.003-05:00

I came across a reading from the classic book The Christian's Secret of a Happy Life. The chapter on service is one that every minister should read. (Read it now.)So often we experience "blue Mondays" because of our reflections on the past, mulling over things best left with God. There is great value in learning from the past and understanding how it came about. At the same time, there is great freedom in leaving it (victories and mistakes) with the Lord.

There is, perhaps, no part of Christian experience where a greater change is known upon entering into the life hid with Christ in God, than in the matter of service.

Forget the things that are behind, the moment they are past, leaving them with God. --As quoted by HWS

Using Quick Response for Ministry

2011-03-03T15:59:00.003-05:00

I noticed how some places where teenagers frequent in our town were using QR codes on their cash desks. Places like Tea Largo, Books-A-Million, and Target are planting these little codes on signs where you pay for your stuff. And why not? What are else are people going to do with their phone while they wait for you to dish out some change? They'll scan the code just to see where it leads.

So, I decided I was going to stick a QR code on our spring retreat t-shirts this year, one that links back to our youth ministry.

You're asking, what's a QR code. Basically, it's a barcode that quickly links a person to a website. You need a barcode reader application and/or camera phone for it to work but most teenagers I know have these on their phones already.

According to Wiki, QR's are common in Japan, where it was created by Toyota subsidiary Denso-Wave in 1994, the QR code is one of the most popular types of two-dimensional barcodes. QR is the abbreviation for Quick Response, as the creator intended the code to allow its contents to be decoded at high speed.

High speed usually isn't my first language but this was so easy to do, how can we not utilize it for ministry? I can't tell everyone how we'll be using our code(s) just yet though, it's a surprise for our students and I don't want to let the cat out of bag just yet.

If you want to make a QR for your ministry, web site, whatever....it's easier than you would think. Click here to make one in less than a minute.

When life hands you lemons...make pinwheels.

2011-03-01T21:55:00.006-05:00

Some things just put a smile on your face. This is one of them.

Making pinwheels might also be something great you can do with your kids, teenagers, or even adults as a prompt to pray--reflect--meditate--make for joy and laughter. I love the Howtoon illustrations. Amazing.

I'm making a few tonight. Whispering prayers, blowing the cares of them to God because He cares for us.

Back to Middle School. Is that an option?

2011-02-26T21:39:00.005-05:00

I work with middle schoolers. I'm a youth pastor. It's my life's work and ministry. At the end of each day, I'm blessed to come home to a family that I feel is the biggest blessing of my life. They are everything and more to me. And because they are everything and because I feel so much responsibility for them, I also feel overwhelmed.

Because...

I try to set aside the cares of ministry on the short mile drive home from work. I try to pick up the cares of my husband and daughters as I exit our jeep and walk into the house.

When I arrive at home I hear the quick pitter patter of my yearling daughter's feet driving toward me. It's as if gravity increases on her head and arms as she reaches toward me, squealing "mommy" with delight as she bobbles just enough to face plant right before the goal, my arms. As I reach for her, my three year old, who is also making the chariots of fire dash to mommy, accidentally steps on little sisters' finger causing more panic and shrill screaming. All the while, I haven't been to the bathroom in hours and can't hold it a second longer. If you were a fly on the wall(and there probably is a fly on my wall)you'd see me emotionally peeing on a toilet with two kids (also crying) on my lap. I'm not the first person in the world to have children but anyone who has ever had them is nodding their head sympathetically.

My husband, the champion of my world, stays at home with the girls close to 40 hours a week. I do not know how he finds the time or space to use the restroom either. It's as if our kids know when we have a dire need and they will do whatever it takes to sidetrack us from it. Things like mommy and daddy eating, bathing, and/ or sleeping are against kid union regulations for sure.

It seems like I start every homecoming out this way. Tears of joy and pain. There always seems to be something on the horizon. If it's not a virus, allergic reaction, or pollen allergies then it most definitely will be an inability to eat vegetables, obey simple instructions, or to stay focused on one task for more than a few minutes.

Seriously, sometimes I feel like I'm never going to catch up, clean up, or shape up.

I try to hear the advice of people like Erma Bombeck who tell us not to worry about the stains on the carpet or dishes in the sink. Being with our family in this present moment is more important. Laughing. Conspiring together. Loving. Holding. I want all of this but there's still the mess that waits for me in the morning.

Dealing with all of this, while holding on to God's promises and whispering for His strength and courage, leaves me reminiscing about what life used to be like when I was the kid.

Middle school wasn't so bad for me. It wasn't so good either. But there are some things that I absolutely loved about that time in my life that keeps me wishing that I could return to them.

I remember being driven places. I love to be driven places. You can sleep, listen to music, read, draw. Please, drive as far away as you like. I'll hang out in the back. Good night.

I remember saving all of my paper route money to "adopt a whale" on the back of a cereal box. Money wasn't too stressful in middle school. You either have some or your don't. It was kind of nice not having a job or any cash flow.

Every event was a new event. I don't remember one time feeling bored with life. Every class in school was different each day because you never knew what was going to happen, who was going to like who, or what sort of substitute teacher you would have. I don't need the drama but I do wish I could look at life again with those curious eyes, always wondering what's going to happen next and bewildered when in gives me something I wasn't expecting.

I never counted calories in middle school. I didn't care. I didn't have a health conscious whatsoever. I used to eat two #2's at McDonald's on the way home from volleyball games (A number 2 at the time was 2 cheeseburgers and fries. I literally would eat 4 cheeseburgers in one sitting in the 7th grade!) Oh how I wish some of the habits I have formed over the years could be erased. It's good to be healthy and I'm glad I'm not eating this way anymore (my husband is also appreciative), but I do wish eating were as carefree as it once was.

Relationships were more important than getting things done. Growing up and getting a job help mess this one up.

Boldness existed, even if it was quiet boldness as expressed in clothing that no adult would be caught dead wearing. I want that kind of courage again. I don't want hammer pants. Don't get me wrong. I want confidence in who I am, whose I am, and who I am not.

Sometimes I really miss this time of life, getting picked up by the parents, being handed lunch money, being bailed out, wearing my personality in the form of fashion, taking dares, going after relationships with everything I've got--even if it leaves me tripping on the floor and getting stepped on by someone else--it was always worth it.

And then I see that I'm giving this very existence to my kids, my sweet girls, and my sweet (and not-so sweet middle schoolers). I had my time to be in the mini van. Now it's their turn.

Knowing that it's my turn to give back helps give me the courage and sense of humor to keep going every day.

There are some things I'll never "get" as a mom, wife, sister, friend, leader, pastor, writer...but one thing that I do get is that all we have is now and we can't spend our lives wishing we were somewhere else in the past or somewhere else in the future. Spending and investing time in God's presence in the present moment with the people who are present with us is the most important thing we can do in life. And I'm grateful for every moment in life that turns me around and reminds me of that.

Today, I felt like ninja mommy, attacking the mess that is life all day long. And I'm thankful because I know I don't have to be a ninja every day and sometimes (sometimes) my kids really do sleep and give me time to do life giving things like write, pray, and brush my teeth.

I thank God for the people who loved me and carried me through middle school so I could look back on it fondly and remember that it's my turn now.

Deal With Conflict (minus spazzing, hissy fits, knuckle punches, or defriending)

2011-02-22T15:45:00.002-05:00

Some of the best advice I've ever received from my boss Dave Ramsey was on the topic of dealing with conflict or addressing issues within an organization.

Being the person I am, I've always worried about the other person's feelings (to a fault) and oftentimes failed to get anything accomplished when addressing things with people.

Emotions are good. They're good signals to what's going on and helpful to us. However, they can hurt us when we're trying to storm through something to a great resolution.

So here's the advice I wrote down on a sticky note in my office. It sits under my phone. It's always there when I feel myself wanting to pitch a fit about something in the wrong way.

When dealing with conflict or needing to address an issue with a co-worker, ministry leader, or superior...

1) Think of the issue as operational. Something isn't working, now it's time to find out where the problem is.

2) Write down the facts before you discuss the issue. Keep them before you. This is key for "emo" people like myself. I need to stay focused to avoid feeling hurt. It sounds funny to say but there's a lot of truth in the facts and they can help us to understand others, communicate more fairly, and remain calm.

3) Try to stay away from how you feel (at least for a little while). Look at the facts and revisit your feelings once you've got them down.

4) When communicating with someone about the problem or issue, use language that keeps you focused.

"The problem is...."

"The facts are...."

When a person gets defensive:

"I'm not attacking you...I'm looking at this issue"

"Help me understand..."

"Remind me why this occurred..."

Storm:

"What can you and I do to resolve this..."

5) Return to your emotions again. They are important. Ask yourself why you felt the way you felt. How were you hurt that made you feel what you felt? What expectation did you have that didn't get met? What need did you have that wasn't supplied? Sometimes these answers can help you forecast conflict before it even begins!

I learned a very important lesson in our pre-marital counseling (when I was only 19 years old). If you have one perspective on an issue and your spouse has an opposite perspective and you would like for the issue to be resolved. Then it's important to stop blocking each others efforts with opposing forces, But instead move to a neutral side to discuss it. On that neutral side you find it much easier to get things done. It makes total sense that things work when we are pressing the issue in the same direction. Progress is made.

I feel like this knowledge has helped me so much in the last decade. Not only to build a strong marriage, but also to build strong working relationships. While, I've had a few working relationships that didn't exactly "work". I did learn through them how I might handle myself better next time.

We're human. We're going to have conflict. But it's really cool when you feel confident enough in your leadership that you can confront, process, reslove, and maintain relationships at the same time.

No Cussing @$#&! Middle School Students Lead the Way

2011-02-21T13:38:00.004-05:00

Learn how one group of middle school students is opening up a can on cursing in their school.

It Ain't Over - Fighting for Family

2011-02-21T09:31:00.004-05:00

This song is dedicated to my sister Courtney. When I first started out in youth ministry I was ministering to teenagers when my own teenage sister needed the most support. There are days when I wish I could have been there for her more. Even today, as she comes out of some really tough stuff I see how God has helped her, rescued her, and loved her by sending the right people at the right time into her life. I have a burden for all of our students but an even greater burden for my family--I pray that she knows that "it ain't over". I'm praying and interceding for you every day. I'm fasting for you. I am constantly lifting you up even though we are far a part.

You keep pressing. Keep progressing. Keep looking up. I know you're moving in the way of miracles. Whatever it takes baby sis. I love you.

Youth Pastor Hair

2011-02-17T22:11:00.005-05:00

This is an odd post but I'm not against posting things that I think will help people. And this information will definitely help some of my peeps out there. This is for my leading ladies and for the dudes out there with serious hair to comb.

Since youth ministry tends to pay the big bucks (haha), it's easy to gravitate toward personal care products like shampoo and conditioner that are overpriced. Alright, alright, that's not the reason. It's because I'm addicted to things that smell good and have nice packaging. The big bummer happens when a product that I spent twenty bucks on doesn't deliver smooth, shiny hair.

Hair is important to me. I've got to have something to set off my youth ministry t-shirt and jeans wardrobe!

After searching high and low for the perfect conditioner, years and years of testing and wasting money, years and years of defaulting to Pantene because it's on sale and it sort of does the job...I've found THE HAIR CAR PRODUCT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR.

It sort of happened on accident. My conditioner wasn't in the shower. It sometimes lands in our bathroom because my husband likes to shave his face with it. Go figure.The only thing in the shower was my 3 year olds' detangeling conditioner.(Suave Kids Moisturizing Conditioner, Apple Scent) I've always loved how good her hair smells after she takes a bath so I thought "why not"!?

I was shocked first time I used it--incredible! Now, I can't wait to try the other scents. It left my hair ridiculously smooth, shiny, and smelling great.

I don't think I'll ever return to adult conditioner again. I order most of our home products on Soap.com and my daughter's conditioner is a whopping $3.84.

And it won't make you cry.

I am so excited. Can you tell? Anyway, I hope you go out and buy a bottle. Enjoy the savings and don't feel guilty one bit about saving money. Now you'll have extra to share...

Living more simply. Hope you are too.

B

Improve Your Serve- Central Florida

2011-02-16T16:27:00.002-05:00

More info here.

Your knowing is more powerful than our secrets...

2011-02-16T08:26:00.007-05:00

My husband sends a weekly email to the college-age Christian community at our church. The prayer found in today's email is too raw, too revelatory, too beautiful, too liberating, too necessary not to pass on.

We have secrets. We're lying if we say that we don't. The beautiful part of admitting this is exactly what Walter leads us into praying, that God's knowing is more powerful than our secrets. That we can take a deep sigh in his presence because we no longer feel the need to cover up or deny anything. Our secrets are emptied of strength and we find ourselves free.

We are free to live. Free to lead each day minus any guilt or shame. We the redeemed, realize that God knows--forgives--and transforms. And we find ourselves liberated, lighter, embraced, exuberant, zealous...

Will you pray?

"Almighty God . . . from whom no secrets are hid

We are rich conundrums of secrets,

we weave a pattern of lies in order to be

well thought of,

we engage in subterfuge about our truth.

We carry old secrets too painful to utter,

too shameful to acknowledge

too burdensome to bear,

of failures we cannot undo,

of alienations we regret but cannot fix,

of grandiose exhibits we cannot curb

And you know them.

You know them all.

And so we keep a deep sigh in your presence,

no longer needing to pretend and

cover up and

deny.

We mostly do not have big sins to confess,

only modest shames that do not

fit our hoped-for selves.

And then we find that your knowing is more

powerful than our secrets.

You know and do not turn away,

and our secrets that seemed too powerful

are emptied of strength,

secrets that seemed too burdensome

are now less severe.

We marvel that when you find us out,

you stay with us,

taking us seriously,

taking our secrets soberly,

but not ultimately,

overpowering our little failure

with your massive love

and abiding patience.

We long to be fully, honestly

exposed to your gaze of gentleness.

In the moment of your knowing

we are eased and lightened,

and we feel the surge of joy move in our bodies,

because we are not ours in cringing

but yours in communion.

We are yours and find the truth before you

makes us free for

wonder, love, and praise -- and new life.

[Taken from Prayers for a Privileged People by Walter Brueggemann]

A new M.O. for youth events...

2011-02-14T09:22:00.004-05:00

Two of our our HP3 friends, Jon and Jessica Nelson have moved to China with their little girl to be the embodiment of Christ to the people they meet there. A recent blog post brought me to tears as I heard about how foreign acts of love and generosity are to the people that they meet. Not only is their journey moving, but it's also a little hilarious. Everything from Mickey Mouse randomly showing up in a park and their daughter getting paparazzi'ed for being a blondie, to this little sign that they saw in a store (totally fitting for youth ministry!) I'm praying that all of us would be open to taking steps of faith to give all that we are and all that we have to share the love of Jesus with our world. And that we'd have plenty of Red Bull and puppies to give teenagers after lock-ins.

Uncovering A World Of Hurt :: Anger Management For Students (And Us Too)

2011-02-08T09:10:00.001-05:00

And dont' sin by letting anger control you. Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry... Ephesians 4:26

We have a counseling center in our office suite. I never take having space to think and work on youth ministry for granted. But I definitely feel like this more recent addition to our environment is over the top blessing for us as we lead and serve teenagers.

The coolest part about having licensed counseling professionals in the hallway is that I have an easy referral. I can always tell a student who needs extra care and support that they have resource right here in our church to help them.

The unexpected side effect to the center's existence are the openings on "the couch" where I find myself from time to time. I always walk out of the room having gained wisdom on how to counsel and respond in different situations. Not to mention the parenting/ personal counsel I get just because Rowena loves people and she can't help but help us.

Today as we discussed a particular situation involving one of our students and one of our counselors clients (with permission) I become aware of a need that I want to learn more about.

Helping students with anger.

I struggle with anger sometimes. If you're being honest, you realize that we all do.

What Rowena, our counselor helped me to think about again today was that there is what she calls a "world of hurt" under the anger we see in our students (or ourselves) and it's important to begin to understand that world if we are to work on it.

Anger leads to bitterness and resentment. It causes us to say and do things that we wouldn't want to say and do. It often leaves us feeling guilty and ashamed but we don't feel like there's a lot we can do to control it. There are students in our ministry who really struggle with anger...anger concomitant with adolescent development can be the perfect storm for disaster.

There is a student that has expressed some anger toward me on Wednesday nights. I try my best not to provoke it but I usually find a way to do just that--when I try to encourage him in the right direction or get him to stop a disruptive or disrespectful behavior.

Rowena gave me some things to remember and to pass on to those who are struggling.

-In everyone's anger there is a world of hurt.

-Beneath that hurt there was probably an expectation that wasn't met--whether it was a fair expectation or not--the hurt or feeling offended comes from this disappointment.

-And under expectations not being met is a core need. Most of the time this need is a need for love, acceptance, belonging, feelings of safety and security.

Helping our students look back to where their anger started is helpful to me. Asking the teenager what's really going on when they puff up and lash out during youth group could give us a clue.

I like the help she offered to me when dealing with my own anger and frustrations. I hope to teach this to my teens who are really struggling with their emotions and actions surrounding them. It's an acronym (ABCD).

Dealing with our anger:

A- AWARE Be aware of your triggers and recognize how they control you.

B- BACK OFF Take a step back from that trigger if you can. Get some space.

C- COOL DOWN Calm down. Don't make any decisions or say anything until you've had some space to settle.

D- DECIDE Once you're head is clear and you are aware of what's happening, decide what you need to do.

I yelled at my daughter the other night when she had an accident while trying to get to the potty. I was exhausted. The panic of my 3 year old woke up our 1 year old. I was hoping to have a few minutes of quiet before bed but instead I would have to clean up the floor, get new pjs, put the baby to bed (again). And I yelled at her. It wasn't her fault. She hadn't been feeling well. She didn't sleep much the night before. She was on medication for her ear ache. There was a lot going on. I would love to become more aware of the triggers that set me off so that I can calm down and make decisions better, that I could stop myself from yelling before I'm in the situation and have another action in mind.

Isn't it all too easy to spout off in a text message, fire off a loaded comment or blog, or vent to someone else when we are angry? But it often leads to more pain and more anger. I pray that we can learn these simple steps and make better decisions. I pray that we learn talk to each other better--that we could lift each other up as we heal.

I hope to encourage our leaders to help teenagers as they learn how to cope with their emotions. Giving them praise for the baby steps along the way...

God is transforming us--by the renewing of our minds, little by little as we allow his movement in our lives. I'm thankful to see this need and to begin to make steps toward understanding more.

If you need someone to help deal you deal an with anger-related situation or need tips on how to regain control. Talk to someone. If you're in Lakeland, Rowena's information is listed here.

Rowena Barnett Lovvorn, M.A.
Director of Counseling Services, Highland Park
rowenal@hpnaz.org

HPNY LIVE || The Story Week 4 || Free Delivery

2011-02-02T12:50:00.003-05:00

It's been so much fun taking this journey with our students through the Bible over the past few weeks. The story of the Exodus is in our face today...heartbreaking, breathtaking, and inspir-ating (ok, had to follow the form there!). Below is my sermon outline for tonight.

Chapter 4 - Deliverance - Teen Curriculum from Zondervan on Vimeo.

Sometimes I doubt God can help me in my real life.
*When I'm not praying, reading the Bible, at church.
*When I'm faced with something unexpected, especially something I'm unprepared for.
*Bar Example, Mya's Allergic Reaction, Texas House

I imagine you've found yourself in situations where you needed an "out" like me. You needed rescued quick but it didn't seem like God or anyone else could do it.

*Wouldn't it be nice to have an app for God (Escape Free)
*During a fight, pressure, a hard choice, abuse, difficulties with school, etc.

The story of Moses and the people of Israel is helpful to us as we struggle with believing that God can and will rescue us and save us. [Watch Zondervan Video]

*You see the many ways God provided for Moses--delivered him from the situations.
(Pharaoh's daughter, Aaron speaking for him, pillar of cloud and fire, manna)
*God withhold any act of power to rescue his people. And he can overcome ANY power.

Turn in your Bibles to Exodus 14:13-14. Memorize this. Bookmark this. Believe this.

"Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians [problems] you see today you will never see again. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still."

Remember that other familiar verse? "Be still and know....know what.....THAT I AM GOD."
Belief leads to knowledge. Knowledge leads to trust. And we can start with believing today.

Next time you're not sure if you can stand firm in your belief in God because of what you are going through.

*Remember this promise. The LORD will save you. Just like God gave me an "out" and rescued me from some situations. He will rescue you. Just like God delivered Moses. He will rescue you. He knows us and our needs.

Imagine what would happen if we all believed that God's power could deliver us and we truly started to TRUST?

Watch this video--as you're watching think about what miracle you need right now.

Moses listened to God and had his people, those who believed, put blood above their doorposts to show that they were followers of God. It was a symbol of promise. That they would be rescued from death. Put something red over your doorpost at home as a reminder that God can and will deliver us.

(Our leaders will have red lipstick at the back of the service to mark students heads as they leave--the purpose is to open discussion with parents and friends about what it means.)

Prayer: Thank you for revealing more of you Story to us tonight. We pray that you will help us see the areas where you want to set us free. We believe that you can do anything and you have power to save us. Amen.

Ministry Shout Out!

2011-01-31T17:43:00.007-05:00

Youth ministry isn't for babies.

(Except for the babies we take everywhere with us because we rarely get babysitters to go out on a date. Why would we get a sitter for a ministry event?)

I talk a lot about youth ministry here and everyone just needs to know this...

I WOULDN'T BE THE LEADER I AM TODAY WITHOUT THE UNWAVERING SUPPORT OF MY HUSBAND, COY.

Not only does he take care of our children while I'm doing ministry, he is ALSO doing ministry. The man is the BEST volunteer I've ever had and he continues to inspire me to greatness.

His insights intrigue me as he has a special view that understands how our our volunteer leaders may feel. I thank God for him.

So here's your chance. Who is it that holds you up? Listens when you vent? Doesn't judge. Loves. Is patient? Parties with you when it's time to celebrate? Cries with you when your heart is broken? Breaks things with you when you've reached your limit?(Haha, just kidding, we don't really break things...that much.)

Feel free to comment your shout out. We can never say thank you enough.

I'll start the party.

Cheers to Coy Lindsey-your humility and care for me, our family, and my ministry have changed my life!

Photo courtesy of Hayley Hurd.

Love Your Leaders

2011-01-27T12:46:00.002-05:00

I was looking for a personalized and inexpensive way to love on our female life group leaders and came across this lovely little treat. I thought it's be worth sharing!

5 Ways to Overcome Thursday Ministry BLAH

2011-01-27T10:07:00.009-05:00

Even on our best nights--I find myself walking into my church on Thursday morning feeling like youth ministry just barfed all over me. Ew. I know that's gross but it's how I feel.

My desk is covered with crap. My assistant's desk is covered with crap. (And by crap, I mean "Creative Resources All Piled".)

My mind is trying to hold on to the things it needs to remember (like who wanted to sign up for the retreat but didn't because they lost the form and they need another one....and who needed prayer because their best friend's house just burnt to the ground...and remember to encourage your worship leader because she did a fantastic job last night leading...and don't forget to clean up that smashed cookies in the foyer because you were too tired to do it last night and you definitely don't want to get the wrap for that even though we did it).

At the same time, there is a wave of relief washing over my mind and soul because I know that we successfully pulled off another week--even though everything in the media booth was trying to convince us otherwise.

The combination of piles, memory loss, and relief are the perfect storm for me. It allows me to get absolutely NOTHING accomplished the first two hours of the morning. Sometimes, I'm really not sure what I'm doing--it looks like I'm just moving piles around on my desk to other peoples desk but what I'm really doing is avoiding all the follow up from the night before.

Here are five things I'm going to do to work on this and I'd imagine there are some great ideas out there--things that you've discovered work well to get you back on track after a long night of ministry. Please share!

1. Eat a good breakfast. Who knows what I ate the night before.

2. Dress like I'm going to get something done. (I'd like to mention that it is Thursday as I write this and I'm wearing sweatpants. I'll start next week.)

3. Make a list for Thursday's work on Tuesday.

4. Look at that list before looking at email, crap piles, and maintenance staff.

5. Focus on doing one thing at a time, being content that God is doing Kingdom work THROUGH us but it's not in our own strength. The yoke Christ made for us fits perfectly. It's easier than the one we've made for ourselves. Trade it out and focus in.

Let the Thursday's in ministry be a day of thriving for us all....

Tune in here. Live webcast. Highland Park Middle School Service.

2011-01-25T15:07:00.003-05:00

Wednesday January 26, 2011 7PM EST
The Story- Rescue (Joseph)

The Story- Chapter 3 | Wednesday Song List

2011-01-25T11:00:00.004-05:00

In our middle school ministry we're going through the Bible chronologically. This week we'll be looking at the story of Joseph. This week's reading was riveting. I think I forgot how compassionate Joseph was toward his brothers. And to think that he didn't even have what we have--the incarnation and physical example of Jesus to follow. Joseph followed God...and found God's heart in the middle of Egypt. Wow.

Each week, I'll be posting some worship songs that would go along well with the story of the Scripture. Feel free to watch together with your family. Load them up on your iPod. Listen as you read. Thanks to Zondervan for providing churches with such an incredible resource in The Story. I'm stoked.

On Our Side Chris Tomlin, Ed Cash, Jesse Reeves
I'll Fly Away Albert E. Brumley
You Never Let Go Beth Redman, Matt Redman
There Is A Balm In Gilead African-American Spiritual
Here I Am, Lord Daniel Schutte, John Weissrock, Michael Pope

Bible Reading, The Key To Success

2011-01-20T09:09:00.003-05:00

I realize that this is the Sunday school answer here but....

it is the answer.

In ten years of youth ministry I'm finally starting to get it.

Reading, discovering, knowing, and sharing the Word of God in youth ministry is second to none. It changes our hearts, it brings depth to what we teach, it transforms our lives.

It started for me last year at the National Outreach Convention. I was wandering though a sea of "new and improved" in the exhibitors area. And honestly, I was feeling a little overwhelmed and a little tired of more new stuff. There are so many new and free ministry resources online that opening the emails, previewing the stuff, sorting through it all can be tiresome and gets me sidetracked from the plans God has given me specifically.

My husband knows I'm a marketers dream. Disney knows how to get me in one commercial. It's the same with ministry stuff. I'm usually and easy sell if something is packaged just right.

But lately, I'm not as interested. I'm trying to stay focused on what we're doing here on the homefront and following the direction of our collective creativity and the work of the Spirit at our church.

So, during my time wandering through the exhibitors at NOC I picked up very little. But what I did pick up is changing the way I do ministry. And maybe, more importantly, changing the way I live.

It's called The Story. It's the text of the Bible condensed into about 31 chapters. Chronologically moving through events from Genesis to Revelations--it reads like a novel. I picked up the Teen edition and was intrigued by the children's edition as well. Little did I know that God would be working on my heart to dive into God's Word on my own in 2011.

During one of our church services the day after Christmas, our pastors wife Mindy shared a journal entry from her Bible from awhile back. She thanked God for the experience of reading the Bible from cover to cover--finally at the age of 38. Through her tearful reading, I could see the joy and the peace she had that year.

I want that joy and that peace. I was a religion major, I went to seminary, I've been in full time pastoral ministry for ten years. And I have NEVER READ THE WHOLE BIBLE.

It was a much needed revelation and I decided to read the Biblw in 2011. With the help You Version's daily reading plan I started the journey. And it's been remarkable.

As I read, the impression to share this journey with my students became more obvious. And that's what we're doing this year. In 32 weeks, I will take our middle schoolers with me through the entire "story" of the Bible.

Already, we've seen fruit, and it's only week 2.

They're bringing their Bibles with them to church.

I'm hearing from parents.

I'm seeing our leaders with Bibles in their hands--and not just as an accessory.

I started thinking, "What if we treated the Word like we do our cell phones?"

I freak if I can't locate my phone for a few minutes. It's always with me, in my hand, pocket, bag, even strapped to me when I'm running.

How can I have that same presence in the Word that defines and guides us in the way of Christ?

Not only is the Bible connecting students with the Story of God but it's helping me with my relationships both in and outside the church. I pray more. I'm a better wife, a better friend, a better leader. And when I mess up, I handle it better and with a grace and a humility that seems hard to hold on to--it comes naturally when I'm living in the Word.

This stuff is self divulging and that's OK. Being honest about where we are on the path makes space for others to do the same. I'm looking forward to every day this year--a new discovery in God's Word and a new perspective on youth ministry that I thought I had but never really understood before.

I won't be praying the same prayers I've always prayed. I won't be thinking about the same go-to verses I've always quoted. I'll be sitting in the middle of the Story thinking about who it says God is, who it says I am, and how I'm meant to share it through my life and ministry.

Mission Trips = Kingdom Workers = $11,000 for Zambia

2011-01-15T21:27:00.005-05:00

Ten summers of mission trips. It seems like only yesterday that we took our first twenty-six hour van ride....ahhh, I can smell the teen spirit just thinking about it.

We've worked with some great organizations, driven countless miles, traveled by air, piled in school buses, and thanked the good Lord every time we returned with all (or most) of the students intact and safe in the church parking lot.

I've always felt like camp and mission trips are the sweet spots of youth ministry, where head and heart meet hands and a beautiful connection is made for teenagers to tag back to in their memories as they grapple with their faith into young adulthood.

The worth has been cumulative over the years but last summer has been the highlight of ministry for me and by sharing it with you, I hope it reminds you of your own highlights, or lifts you up to a place where you can see something like this happening for your students.

I also hope that in the telling it would light a fire under you to get that next mission trip on the books.

A little birdie goes a long way...

Last summer we decided to change things up a little and take our students on a mission trip with an organization that we hadn't worked with before. (Christ In Youth) We signed up for Know Sweat.

The whole deal was fantastic and wonderfully intentional. But the thing that set the evening program a part was the work CIY had done to put together a film to teach teenagers about the clean water crisis in Zambia, Africa. A short film was shown called "Zambia's Song". It was a touching depiction of one young girls struggle for clean water. After the film, our students who had been hearing Christ's call all week to become Kingdom workers, were asked how they might help.

What will you do with your gifts?

One of our teenagers, 12 year old Emily, was listening. She thought to herself, "I can sew". After returning home and pitching her idea to her mom she pitched her idea to me.
She and a friend--Allyson wanted to sew and sell handmade birds to raise money to purchase bio-sand filters for people in Zambia--through an organization called Active Water. Her proposal was sweet. I told her $2 a bird seemed a little low. "Let's shoot for $5 a bird I suggested." They wanted to call it "Birds of Hope"and their goal was to raise $500. That would be about six filters--effecting the lives of about one hundred people.

We started a facebook group, got a little logo (thanks CEDESIGN), the girls started sewing and the coolest thing happened.

They met their goal.

We celebrated together as a church on stage. Not only had they met their goal but they had surpassed it by $500 in only a couple of weeks!

Five months and a few thousand birds later...

Emily, Allyson, and their dedicated families are close to turning in $11,000.00.

In essence, they'll be able to provide the people of Zambia with about 138 bio-sand filters--that's over 2,000 people who won't be sick because our girls said "yes".

I believe a mission trip gave them the opportunity to get some head space, grow in the Word, be exposed to the call for kingdom workers, and feel encouraged to do whatever it is they can with what they have right here on earth, right now.

You can follow the Birds of Hope story from beginning to today on facebook--but the thing that makes this story so great is that God did the work. I had all sorts of plans that week but God wanted me to get Emily there so He could begin the work in her heart. God wanted me to get Allyson to a place where she could sense the urgency of the Kingdom and do something about it.

I'm blessed to be a part of what the Holy Spirit has done in these girls' hearts. It has nothing to do with me but I like to think that God uses us as bridges for the work that will be done through the lives of our teenagers.

Get ready for summer. It's right around the corner. You just never know what fruit will be on the vine because you did...

Jodie Berndt: Parenting Your Teens Through Prayer

2011-01-09T08:42:00.001-05:00

Today's Parent Connect Topic @ Highland Park
9:00-10:00 AM
Family Ministry Building

If you can't make it, go ahead and read this article on how you can parent through prayer.

Jodie Berndt: Parenting Your Teens Through Prayer

What every parent needs to know.

2011-01-06T20:31:00.003-05:00

There is one lesson that every Christian parent needs to know…one truth that I want to be reminded of as I rear my own kids into adolescence and eventually adulthood.

It’s a simple lesson but one that’s easy to forget if we’re not grooming it into existence.

Here it is in the form of a question.
Parents, do you wonder what God’s will for your life is?

Disciple your children.

Tell them about Jesus. Lead them by living your faith in front of them. Teach them. And raise them to be baptized and workers in the body of Christ.

Not only does research beg for parents to lead the way in a child’s faith development. (A parents’ influence is the sole reason why a teenager will have a high faith importance growing up.) But the Bible commands us to make disciples.

Regrettably, we tend to share a default view of the command to “make disciples” that’s limited to the context of formal ministry. Meaning outreach to people I’m not related to. Meaning to act as missionary somewhere else. Meaning to facilitate a Bible study and leading a small group. But it also means leading my own children to Christ and being someone who disciples the people around me as a way of life. As cute and wonderful as they are, our kids/ teenagers have sinned and come short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23) and it’s our responsibility along with the body of Christ (the church) to show them what the gift of God is (eternal life in Christ and living in his kingdom purpose).

I was reminded of this when I was reading David Platt’s book, Radical. In a section when he is talking about making disciples he says,

Any Christian can do this. You don’t need to have inordinate skill or unusual abilities to make disciples. You don’t need to be a successful pastor or a charismatic leader to make disciples. You don’t need to be a great communicator or innovative thinker to make disciples. That’s why Jesus said every Christian must do this.
One of the unintended consequences of contemporary church strategies that revolve around performances, places, programs, and professionals is that somewhere along the way people get left out of the picture.

But according to Jesus, people are God’s method for winning the world to himself. People who have been radically transformed by Jesus. People who are not sidelined to sit in a chair on Sundays while they watch the professionals take care of ministry for them. People who are equipped on Sundays to particpate in ministry every day of the week. People who are fit and free to do precisely what Jesus did and what Jesus told us to do. Make disciples. (p. 91)

And who better to begin with than our own children.

Youth leaders and youth pastors are important. The church is important. But most important is the daily influence of parents and their radical obedience to Christ.

Since disciples of Jesus—--genuine, committed, self-sacrificing followers of Christ—--are not made over night then we should encourage and equip the people who have them overnight for the longest period of their human lives. Parents.

Tell your parents that you want them to realize their importance in their teenager’s faith. Tell your parents that you want them to understand the influence they posses. Remind them often and then tell them again. It’s our shared responsibility to make disciples and we may have some of the best encouragement they can get.

Another benefit of using the iPhone 4

2011-01-04T12:50:00.002-05:00

Besides using my iPhone for...

* entertaining our three-year-old at dinner
* checking in for a flight at the last minute
* facetime-ing a good friend when our lives are exploding with goodness
* finding antique stores in towns I'm not familiar with
* reading books that I don't have room in my bag for anymore
* receiving alarms to eat, read my Bible, and sit down
* using the reverse camera feature to peek at our baby in the back seat so she won't know I'm looking

...it's also useful for youth ministry.

Today, I'll take a stab at using the video feature to share our Wednesday night announcements and a bit of our 2011 vision with our students. I'll be traveling to Tulsa for a couple of days to work with Christ In Youth and I'll be missing our vision and kick-off night so I'm hoping this will work.

Basically, I'll record the video. MMS it to our youth ministry assistant and have him load it into Pro Presenter. I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck.

Youth Ministry Resolutions 2011

2010-12-21T14:11:00.005-05:00

Matt and I worked on the HPNY Middle School Vision for 2011 today. In the process, we came up with some new year's resolutions. We may tweak them a little along the way as we work out our ministry goals and the strategies that go along with them but for the most part these are going to help us along in 2011. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

HPNY Middle School 2011

We resolve to let God dream in us. We refuse to let our own minds limit God's possibilities.

We resolve to recruit passionate leaders.

We resolve to train the leaders we recruit and love them into serving where their strengths shine.

We resolve to use social media as a tool but we refuse to let it be the only way we build relationships.

We resolve to play as much as we pray this year, celebrating every seed planted and every heart changed.

We resolve to partner with parents every month in conversation that's helpful to them.

We resolve to look at every program and truly weigh it's worth in how it teaches us to love God and love others sacrificially.

We resolve to change what we're doing, even if we're caught midstream, to follow God's leading this year.

A Question Worth Asking

2010-12-15T11:26:00.002-05:00

Father God, Why is it that I think I must get somewhere, assume some position, be gathered together, or separated apart in the quiet of my study to pray?

Why is it that I feel that I have to go somewhere or do some particular act to find you, reach you, and talk with you?

Your presence is here...on the busy bus, in the factory, in the cockpit of the airplane; in the hospital--in the patients' rooms, in the intensive care unit, in the waiting room; in the home--at dinner, in the bedroom, in the family room, at my workbench; in the car--in the parking lot, at the stop light.

Lord, reveal your presence to me everywhere, and help me become aware of your presence each moment of the day.

May your presence fill the nonanswers, empty glances, and lonely times of my life. Amen

From A Thirty-Day Experiment in Prayer by Robert Wood

Rest. We all need it.

2010-11-26T23:29:00.004-05:00

Myself included.

When was the last time you spent more than three days unplugged from the information pipeline and plugged into your loved ones, their beautiful faces, and entrenched in real time conversations, daydreaming, and whimsy?

I can't remember the last time I was unplugged. A few weeks ago my husband and I spent a week without our children in San Diego but I was still honed in on my iPhone to anything that "needed" my attention.

Technology isn't bad. It's good. Facebook isn't bad. It's good. Email, while some might contend it is evil due to it's ability to multiply exponentially, it's actually pretty amazing and it helps us do things like we've never done them before. Twitter connects us to a generation that is learning to speak a new language. Quite a nifty tool for someone who is just learning to speak her own native language.

It's all pretty good stuff. But I can't help but thank God for setting the example. Creating the whole world and everything in it, then resting for an entire day from the good stuff. Can you imagine how weird that would have felt to create two entirely new beings called humans, then wait a whole day to spend time with them?

Discipline.

God knew...we need to rest from the good stuff too. The point--we need to rest. We're wired for it. It creates space in us to receive.

It gives us a glimpse at peace.

It points the way to understanding how we can allow the good stuff to be a blessing instead of a curse.

I get busy. We all do. But God wants us to look at all the good in your life--and take time to rest from it. Even for a day.

In the meantime, I'm logging out. No guest posts. No status updates. (Where's my dusty journal?) No blogging or tweeting---just rest and quality time for the ones who give me life to do what I get to do each and every day.

I'm resting, not stressing....listening, not talking....seeing, not doubting.....

I'll be back in December, while I'm gone. I hope you'll rest some too.

One more reason to be thankful.

2010-11-24T13:33:00.001-05:00

Teenagers say the most wonderful things.

Austin (8th Grade): "Can preachers be girls?"
Austin's Mom: "Umm, what do you think Pastor Brooklyn is?"
Austin: "Oh yeah!"

How story plays into sharing our faith.

2010-11-23T14:57:00.002-05:00

Most people want to be free. Most people want to be forgiven. Most people want to know what it feels like to experience unconditional love. Hearing how you’ve experienced all of these things may just be the bridge to their own stirring and curiosity for God. And in the midst of the telling, we find the gentle and prevenient grace of God doing the important work of love in our hearts.

Read the rest of my slant at Slant33.

Thank You | Leaving a Legacy

2010-11-17T15:53:00.004-05:00

It was hard to hold back the tears as I watched this video and heard this song.

As I watched it, specific couples in the church came to my mind. Of these people, I've said before, "I want my life to count like theirs has, I want to love like they do."

Our children and our students need us to model love in our relationships. If you're married in ministry, watch this video and remember that your love toward your spouse will speak volumes to the children and teenagers in your lives. More than words ever could....

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

$3.99 Downloadable Video Illustrations – Purity Ring 3000 at Bluefish TV

2010-11-10T08:45:00.002-05:00

This week in our "Rooted" series we'll be talking about what it means to be rooted in purity. We found this awesome illustration online to poke a little fun at ourselves but to also open up the conversation in a lighthearted way. We'll be taking a look at Ephesians 5:1-21 together and talking about how purity can be a way of life--starting now.

"For you were once darkness, but no you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light." Ephesians 5:8

$3.99 Downloadable Video Illustrations – Purity Ring 3000 at Bluefish TV

Teach this song:

2010-11-09T13:06:00.003-05:00

My husband and I attended Erwin McManus' Mosaic church downtown Los Angeles last Sunday. The band played this song that I had never heard before and the leader sang it beautifully and powerfully. It brought me to a place of worship that I haven't experienced in a awhile because I'm always so busy at church. Both the setting and the song caught me off guard--a totally good thing. The lyrics are prayer about the garden of Gethsemane. Props to Need To Breathe for writing something so original and moving . It would be wonderful to teach this song to students as an anthem for a semester, a series, or for an entire year. I may just do that. Thanks to whoever led worship at Mosaic last Sunday--you took us there.

Steve Jobs Isn't Jesus- But Maybe He Knows Him?

2010-11-08T22:49:00.000-05:00

I came across this quote by Steve Jobs. I think it resonated with me because Jesus said similar things long before Jobs bit into the apple. It's more than a pithy line for the trends of today. I believe this advice is the most upgraded version, so don't worry about something better coming down the pipeline. We really all could use this reminder when we find ourselves wanting for another persons life (or another persons phone).

“Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” --Steve Jobs, American Entrepreneur, Apple Co-Founder

“Do not let your hearts be troubled.Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you (your uniqueness and your personality included)." --Jesus, John 14:1

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful I know that full well." David, Psalm 139:14