Let’s face it, there are a lot of youth leaders out there with kiddos. For nearly a decade I’ve watched youth workers at conventions chase toddlers through lobbies, push double strollers, feed babies, and walk out of sessions because the baby didn’t necessarily like the main stage speaker.
That wasn’t me for a long time. In fact, I wondered how someone could be that crazy to haul a little one to something so big and busy. That was until I found myself sitting in a “Lost and Found” performance with a one year old, after 10 PM. Yeah, it happened. I became a mommy in full time youth ministry. With husband in tow (actually, he does most of the towing) we travel around to schools, church, youth group, youth ministry events, trainings, and other places with child.
Our toddler is now nearing the age of three and we’re finally at the point where we are starting to see the light. Even though she still isn’t sleeping through the night, hardly eats, and never wants to take off her princess dress, we were starting to get the hang of things as they have changed—in life, in marriage, in parenting, in ministry—then we got pregnant again. (Cue the scary music.)
While we’re super happy about baby number two, it was sort of freaky thinking about how this changes things…again. We are at a point in our lives when things never seem to slow down. What I would give for those college days when we could sleep three hours in between classes, watch movies on the weekends, and eat cereal for dinner every night!
Youth ministry changes when you have children. It changes when you are eight months pregnant and can’t make it through a ten-minute youth sermon because you’re too winded to finish. Youth ministry changes when you start thinking about “your little girl” going to the lock-in someday. Your perspective starts to widen and you start making decisions with different things in mind.
I’m not saying that you become a better youth minister when you have children, because I was able to give differently in youth ministry before having children, ways that I often miss now (i.e. staying up all night telling scary stories in a tent during the fall retreat) However, I am saying that having children gives us new insight. Just like traveling to another culture where we learn new things and come back looking at life differently, it’s the same for youth ministers who become parents, we start seeing things through a different lens.
The childbearing years may seem like the most tiresome and unrelenting years of our lives because there are so many things to juggle. But I’m learning to love this season and the lessons it’s teaching me (and there are so many lessons!).
I’m loving the middle school kid who wanted to know last week “if I was really pregnant” (I’m due in two months). I’m loving the volunteers that support me when I’m needing help (there are just some things I can’t physically do right now). I’m loving the students who continue to prefer deep relationships over a cool youth pastor who can take a whipping from a paint ball gun (For the record, I have never been able to do that, prego or not). I’m loving my husband that walks beside me when I lose my mind for no apparent reason (Happening more often that I would like). I’m loving that I get to do exactly what I want to do with my life, and be a mom—full-time. Not many people get this sort of gift and for that I’m seriously grateful.
I’m sure there are many who share these feelings, people grateful to serve both their families and the church at the same time, may we consider how blessed we truly are.
Wednesday
Sunday
You're invited to an exclusive advance showing of To Save A Life. RSVP HERE.
Make sure you bring the other pastors at your church — they won't want to miss this!
WATCH the TRAILER | Visit the Leader Website | Visit the official Movie Website
To Save A Life is an indie movie about the real-life challenges of teens and their choices. It's the kind of movie youth workers, parents and student leaders can get behind: a project inspired by a passion to reach teenagers with life-affirming entertainment. To Save A Life dives into raw youth culture and dares to ask our youth: What's your life going to be about?
But it's more than just a movie—it's a feature-length film with follow-up opportunities like a youth group curriculum, a teen devotional, and a church-wide campaign centered around the biblical concept that we're never more like Jesus than when we're reaching out to the hurting and lonely.
Be prepared to be entertained and inspired to live differently. After you see it, you'll want every teenager in your life and ministry to see the movie when it comes to theaters this January.
I worked on the Devo2Go project. I'm excited about the potential these mp3 devotions have to impact the lives of our students. You can preview every week here.
About the Movie: To Save A Life was written by Jim Britts, a seasoned youth pastor with a film degree from BIOLA University, and brought to life by a team of gifted Hollywood professionals. Produced by New Song Pictures, a team of filmmakers from Oceanside, CA, To Save A Life is being brought to the big screen through Outreach Films, an organization that equips churches with film and visual media tools to reach their communities for Jesus Christ. Outreach Films has been involved in important Christian films such as The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, The Passion of the Christ, FIREPROOF and End of the Spear.
New Blog Posts
I've been posting on the Youth Specialties blog for the past few months. For new youth ministry blog posts written by me and others visit here.
Saturday
Lock-In Cheer
Ten reasons why I love (and hate) our annual youth lock-in:
10. Seeing the student’s faces when they realize that they must “endure” a worship service before the real fun starts (did they actually think we would let 600 students have fun without hearing the Gospel first?)
9. Watching them genuinely respond during the worship service, minds opened to Christ, calls to ministry felt, hearts broken…then five minutes later moshing each other in the blow up obstacle course.
8. Eating enough pizza to meet my youth pastor quota each year, chances are I will eat more than one pie, just to stay awake…and midnight trips to Denny’s sure do help the heartburn.
7. Church van smells are wonderfully different– liken to the smell of McDonald’s fries mixed with dirty sock.
6. Hugging students who are sweating before 10 PM with 8 hours still left on the clock. This is where the awkward side-hug rule becomes your glorious friend.
5. Unlimited go-cart rides. It’s not the go cart action that’s my favorite, it’s the inhalation of gas fumes all night long that keeps things exciting.
4. The giant Ferris-wheel of prayer. Why prayer? Because all leaders are praying that no one is making out at the top when the thing breaks down for ten minutes.
3. Volunteers love lock-ins. It’s like the purple heart of youth ministry for them.
2. Burning red eyes keep us relevant…New Moon is coming out soon.
But the number one reason I love (and hate) our annual lock-in is…
1. The memories connect our students to our youth group for a long time (or scar them for the same duration). Either way, it’s a night no one forgets and the outcomes are definitely worth the five years of life I lose each year in spite of it.
10. Seeing the student’s faces when they realize that they must “endure” a worship service before the real fun starts (did they actually think we would let 600 students have fun without hearing the Gospel first?)
9. Watching them genuinely respond during the worship service, minds opened to Christ, calls to ministry felt, hearts broken…then five minutes later moshing each other in the blow up obstacle course.
8. Eating enough pizza to meet my youth pastor quota each year, chances are I will eat more than one pie, just to stay awake…and midnight trips to Denny’s sure do help the heartburn.
7. Church van smells are wonderfully different– liken to the smell of McDonald’s fries mixed with dirty sock.
6. Hugging students who are sweating before 10 PM with 8 hours still left on the clock. This is where the awkward side-hug rule becomes your glorious friend.
5. Unlimited go-cart rides. It’s not the go cart action that’s my favorite, it’s the inhalation of gas fumes all night long that keeps things exciting.
4. The giant Ferris-wheel of prayer. Why prayer? Because all leaders are praying that no one is making out at the top when the thing breaks down for ten minutes.
3. Volunteers love lock-ins. It’s like the purple heart of youth ministry for them.
2. Burning red eyes keep us relevant…New Moon is coming out soon.
But the number one reason I love (and hate) our annual lock-in is…
1. The memories connect our students to our youth group for a long time (or scar them for the same duration). Either way, it’s a night no one forgets and the outcomes are definitely worth the five years of life I lose each year in spite of it.
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